Born a Disaster

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Sorina

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Oct 15, 2007
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Chapter one

Walking up and down the stairs was maria, again, panicking. She was only 13 but still, was her love life a mistake? "I've got to ask someone. This could be a TOTAL mistake!!!" Though, suddenly mrs kadley rushed past her. "Mrs kadley... Thats it!!" Whilst jumping up, maria nearly feel down the flight of stairs. "Mrs kadley, can I speak to you about something private?" She asked very nervously. "Can it wait maria?" Replied mrs kadley in her sweetest voice. "I'm very erm, busy at the moment." "Yes it can mrs kadley. I'll speak to you at lunch". flopping to her lesson, maria saw the strangest thing, a light? No it was...It was something strange which maria had no idea what. "I Have ten mins to my lesson so I guess I can check it out". Walking up to this very strange thing maria still couldnt make it out until she got right up to it.

I think its good so far but what about you?

 
I think its cute. There are a few grammatical errors but you aren't sharing it with us to proofread it, are you? :)

Keep going with it. I think the part explaining the strange light is a little awkward, maybe reword it? But I like your writing style, like I said it was cute.

Happy writing.

 
I think its cute. There are a few grammatical errors but you aren't sharing it with us to proofread it, are you? :)
Keep going with it. I think the part explaining the strange light is a little awkward, maybe reword it? But I like your writing style, like I said it was cute.

Happy writing.
Thanks. No I dont want to publish it i'm just kinda bored so I started writing

 

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