Ninja infestations

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Behind you. Didn't see me? That's because I'm a ni
Everyday! Everyday! I come home from a long day at work only to see my house perfectly clean, everything as I left it, and a black flash in the side of my eye. I've got freaking ninjas! Last week, they bought an industrial furnace and forging equipment, made it invisible, shrank it with their ninja powers, then put it into the air ducts. It makes no noise whatsoever! The ninjas are always stealing screws from my screw collection and melting them into shruinkens! They even buy me new screws! But I can tell that that cheap replacement isnt my jeffery. I miss jeffery. He was always my favorite screw. These ninjas will not leave my house, I even tried to smoke them out and posion their hideout! It is airtight, and they also got ninja insurance, so if I try to knock it down, the ninja repairmen come and fix it in seconds! AHHH, PLEASE HELP ME! ( I would love to hear about other infestations, so I can maybe get some useful tips on HOW TO GET RID OF THOSE SCREW KILLING MANIACS!)

 
I had ninjas once. Now they are replaced by tiny sumos living in the walls, only coming out at night to feed on breadcrumbs. . . They are extremely noisy during the night when they wrestle all over the place and leaves a mess. Trust me, stick with the ninjas, there are worse things that go "Yokozuna" in the night.

 
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