Jessica Tashi: A kind and pleasant yet smart and funny girl. She is your typical 8th grader- obsessed with boys, celebrities, and fashion. She is Drew’s ex in the beginning but eventually gets back with him. She is class president at Haver Middle School.
Ken Niles: A star quarterback for the Haver Hawks. He is very handsome. Has an on/off relationship with Kirsten.
Kirsten Rockwell: She is a rather popular cheerleader at Haver Middle School. Her catchphrase is, “5, 6, 7, 8, ___ is totally great!” She is extremely fashionable.
Drew Hunter: Jessica Randall’s ex, and then becomes her boyfriend again. He is very arrogant and is a member of the basketball team.
Tricia Tashi: Jessica’s older sister, she has her license and is basically the party queen of Rose High School. She is a member of the cheer squad there, the Rose Rebels.
Katrina Tashi: Jessica’s mother. She works as a lawyer and is single.
Maria Wagner: Jessica’s enemy. She is very rich and spoiled.
Yasmin Bauer: Kirsten’s enemy. She is very rich and spoiled. She is also a bit blonde.
Madison Needham: Known as basically the class clown of Haver. She is smart and very good friends with Jessica and Kirsten.
Rick Gregory: An emo guy at Haver. He likes Maria, even though she doesn’t know it.
Adrian Amoroso: A dead serious tomboy at Haver. Madison says she never will be funny.
(Scene in home, Kirsten and Jessica)
Kirsten: Get over it, Jess. Drew obviously just wanted to dump you easily.
(Jessica wails loudly)
Jessica: I know! But hello? Why would he send me A BOOK?!
(Kirsten looks puzzled)
Kirsten: I dunno. What book is it?
Jessica: It was, like, homemade. Construction paper and stuff.
(Kirsten picks up the book from the mess strewn across the coffee table)
Kirsten: Oh, my gosh, it’s titled, How to Please Drew!
(Kirsten throws at Jessica’s mannequin)
Kirsten: What is wrong with that self-centered, arrogant jerk?!
Jessica: That’s my problem! That, that....
Kirsten: Whatever. Let’s go shopping at Bonnie’s Boutique, they just got the summer shipment in! And there’s a sa-ale....
(Jessica jumps up)
Jessica: Let’s go!
(At Bonnie’s boutique, Maria Wagner and Yasmin Bauer)
Maria: Yasmin! Come look at this gorgeous top!
Yasmin: Awesome, Maria, Drew will absolutely LOVE you in that top.
(Yasmin picks up a miniskirt)
Yasmin: Think this will go with my white lacy tank top?
(two look at each other)
Maria and Yasmin: NAH!
(Jessica and Kirsten enter)
Jessica: Hey, look, Kirsten, it’s the DoubleSnob twins!
Maria: It’s the Doublemint Twins.
Kirsten: Funny, I never thought of you as models.
Yasmin: You don’t know the first thing about modeling.
Bonnie: She doesn’t, but I do.
(sweet voice) Chorus: Hi, Bonnie!
Bonnie: And I can tell you, Yasmin, that the four of you have taken my modeling course. Now, since you four are my favorite customers, I’ll let you take home one free thing today.
(Girls run for expensive racks)
(Maria and Yasmin pick out identical dresses, Kirsten buys skirt, and Jessica takes jacket)
Chorus: Thanks, Bonnie!
(Bonnie shoos them out)
(Maria and Yasmin flounce off, Kirsten and Jessica go to food court for dinner)
Jessica: Cheeseburger with no pickles, medium order of fries, and a small Coke, please.
Kirsten: Swiss burger with extra cheese, large order of fries, and a large Diet Coke.
Cashier: That’ll be $12.58.
(Jessica gives a 20 dollar bill and gets change and food)
(Kirsten and Jessica begin eating)
Kirsten: Say what?
Jessica (swallowed): Why’d you order so much food?
Kirsten: I’m hungry and I ordered a Diet Coke.
(Jessica shrugs and returns to wolfing down fries with ketchup)
(Girls eat in silence for awhile before all is left are fries and sodas)
Jessica: So, what should I do about Drew?
Kirsten: Leave it to me, girl.
Jessica: Okay... oh, my gosh, I have to go home! Later!
(Kirsten waves and Jessica runs home)
(Kirsten whips out cell phone)
Kirsten: Leave it to Kirsten.
(Kirsten calls Drew)
Kirsten: Hey Drew!
Drew: Oh, hey Kirsten.
Kirsten: So I was wondering if you’d like to go out on Friday.
Drew: You know I’m single. And sure.
Kirsten: Okay, pick me up at 6:00, buh bye!
(Both hang up and Kirsten grins wickedly)
Drew: Hey Kirsten!
Jessica (when he is out of hearing distance): What was that ‘bout?
Kirsten: Nothing. Nothing at all.
(Bell rings and everyone goes to classes)