Err.

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blue♣slip

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In a piano. Yes, IN a piano.
She lit a fire that went through her,

So that she could forget

She lit a fire that ripped through her,

Till there was nothing left,

 

She set fire to the city,

A fire so she could be free,

she set fire to the city,

That burned till it was empty,

 

And then she threw herself from the window,

But only because she knew I would follow,

She laughed as I fell and I slipped away,

She laughed as I fell, and I could't say-

 

She she lit a fire where my heart should be,

Until it burned up and ripped through me,

And she lit a fire where my heart should be,

Until she was sure that I was empty,

 

And we waited every night,

Where her heart should be,

And we waited every night,

And it never came, never came,

And we waited every night,

Where her heart should be,

And we waited every night,

And we were always alone.

 

And she threw herself out of the window,

But only because she knew I'd follow,

She laughed and I fell and I slipped away,

She laughed as I fell and I burned awayx

[SIZE=8pt]Butyeah.[/SIZE]

Recently, I was upset.

It was written as a result.

Truthfully, I don't think it's very good.

T,hat's what happens, though, writing when upset.

I dunno how I feel, exactly.

'Morbid. Ha.

Doing this, I think I wanna post another later.

Everything that isn't nothing.

And am I making sense?

Definately not.

;;Feedback?

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Personally, I really like it. It's dark, but it leaves an image in your head. I could picture a firey city, and I just… I like. I dunno. It’s good. ^^;

 
Alex, really?

Truthfully, I don't think it's very good.

How many million times have I told you that you are an amazing writer. One of the best I know. How many times, Alex? I love you, and I love your writing.

:]

Don't doubt yourself ever again--this is like what? the millionth time, Ahlex. I love it.

 
So I already posted my opinion but I think I should say more. Alex, this poem is beyond amazing. I absolutely love it. But I must say, I'm terribly sorry.

 

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