DATING?!?!?

People are starting to date in my class and I'm in 6th grade.

 

I will write in violet

 

My friend [Ondraya] will write in pink

 

Ondraya's friend [kayla] will write in blue

 

And me and Ondraya's crush [Mitchell] will write in red

 

 

I sit by Mitchell while Ondraya is at another table.

It all started last year while Mitchell crushed on Ondraya

I crushed on him.

Now were in a situation while my best friend is going out with my crush.

Here's how it happened:

 

 

9/24/09

*I'm working on spelling and I sit by my cwushy.*

"Hey Mitchell"

"Um, hi"

"Will you go out with Ondraya?"

"I'll think about it"

"OK" *walks away and tells Ondraya*

*I didn't hear any of what happened*

"What happened? What's going on? Sorry I'm really snoppy."

"Sometimes boys and girls are too nervous to ask people out."

*What the freak is going on?*

 

9/25/09

Mitchell told me that he and Ondraya were going out. Ondraya was absent because she died of embarrassment and told Kayla not to ask him out.

 

 

 

 

So i ask you the people of tamatalk this, should people in 6th grade date? AND Kayla knew I liked Mitchell. Why do you think she asked out Mitchell for Ondraya when she said not too. Should I tell Ondraya that Mitchell said that they were going out? WHY AM I ASKING SO MANY QUESTIONS!

In my opinion, they shouldn't. I mean, what is the purpose of "dating" someone when you're 11 and 12 years old? Honestly, it's not like they're going to kiss or go on an actual date. Kids are too obsessed with finding a boyfriend/girlfriend now, it seems. They all just seem to do it for the sole purpose of being able to say they have a boyfriend/girlfriend. Not to mention gaining popularity status. I think it's foolish.

People this age seem to only date so they can say that they have a boyfriend/girlfriend. I know a few people our age who are dating or have dated, and it just causes problems. My friend dated this other guy, and they broke up. It then made school pretty awkward for both of them. So yeah, dating at a young age just causes problems.

"Dating" in 6th grade isn't a good idea. 7th and 8th grade is more appropriate.. I wouldn't start dating until like I'm thirteen or fourteen. Eleven just isn't a good age to date.

So i ask you the people of tamatalk this, should people in 6th grade date? AND Kayla knew I liked Mitchell. Why do you think she asked out Mitchell for Ondraya when she said not too. Should I tell Ondraya that Mitchell said that they were going out? WHY AM I ASKING SO MANY QUESTIONS!

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I'm not going to lie, but a lot of that I didn't entirely get.

But, I understand dating at 11 and 12... I don't 100% approve of it, but I understand it. It's only natural of us - the media makes relationships look glamorous, and most people dream of finding "the one" that will someday make their life complete. Most pre-teens are finding themselves and are excited about growing up (I know I was)!

Dating isn't always a "bad" situation at that age... (I'm keeping an open mind here). It gives you experience and knowledge, and let's face it - you learn about relationships through experience.

But it's a lot wiser to wait though and make friends. Friends are going to be around longer and are probably going to provide a stronger support system for you. Ex-boyfriends and ex-girlfriends make for some pretty sticky / awkward situations. :I

Dating at such a young age though doesn't make for a great mindset in the future - having a "significant other" for so long, starting at such a young age, can encourage a mindset of needing someone and not being able to be happy single, which isn't a healthy mindset under nearly any circumstance.

So basically, it's wiser to wait until you're a bit older for a relationship, but it's not total and complete blasphemy.

As for why Kayla asked Mitchell out for Ondraya even though Ondraya didn't want her to? Well, I don't completely understand the situation, but either a) she likes stirring up drama she thought she knew best for Ondraya and wanted to hook her up with Mitchell c) Ondraya didn't make it entirely clear that she did NOT want her to ask Mitchell out for her.

And yes, you should tell Ondraya what is going on. She has a right to know!

Honestly I don't think I know/knew any 6th grade couple who lasted more than like a month.

To me they just do it for social status or to seem older.

Imo they change their mind way too often to be able to hold a relationship at 11.. for the most part anyway.

Dating isn't always a "bad" situation at that age... (I'm keeping an open mind here). It gives you experience and knowledge, and let's face it - you learn about relationships through experience.

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While it may be true that you learn about relationships through experience, I don't entirely agree. I believe it is a bad situation at that age. You don't need experience about dating at the age of 11 or 12, and when relationships end at that age, it's not always pretty. I remember when I thought I was so cool because I had a "boyfriend" in 6th grade, and when we "broke up" I was a mess. So it's just a better idea altogether to wait until you're older and know more about dating and the person you want to date.

Talk to all of them. If you feel too shy to talk to them face-to-face, then IMing or texting would be okay, but it's best to talk to them face-to-face.

I think it's okay to date in 6th grade (that makes you, 11? 12?). You aren't going to be doing anything, are you? I mean, I don't like kids who just go out with the first person to ask them, even if they don't even like them. I think that is completely stupid.

I agree with what Cinderpelt said about the mindset of needing someone when you really don't. You still have the rest of your life to find 'The One' and get married and all that stuff. I prefer being single, but that's because I'm kinda scared of relationships, 'important' or not.

Bascially I agree with everything Cinderpelt said, actually. :3

Yeah... Middle School relations ships aren't real.

I'm in 5th and some people are dating. x_x

I think people would start dating around eighth, which sounds reasonable to me.

Oh.. people have been dating since I was in the 5th grade.

Nothing special.. It's just that when you're in such a early grade, some kids just don't take it serious as an older audience would.

Let them live, and have fun. We're new to everything.

I think dating at any age is fine as long as you actually like them and aren't just with them for the novelty of having a boyfriend/girlfriend.

I had a boyfriend in year 6. He was amazing and we really liked each other. We spent heaps of time together.

It lasted into year 7 and only ended because he moved ages away and neither of us did distance xD

And your story confused me. I didin't really get it.

I think dating at any age is fine as long as you actually like them and aren't just with them for the novelty of having a boyfriend/girlfriend.I had a boyfriend in year 6. He was amazing and we really liked each other. We spent heaps of time together.

It lasted into year 7 and only ended because he moved ages away and neither of us did distance xD

And your story confused me. I didin't really get it.

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In a nutshell: ZOMG LITTLE KIDS ARE DATING!!1111

THEY'RE TOO YOUNG TO DATES!!!1111

I say let them get on with it.

If they are dating just to have a boyfriend or girlfriend, then that's stupid. But if they actually have feelings for one another, why not? Love can start at any age. Sorta. My cousin & her boyfriend first started dating when they were eleven. Of course they broke up now & then in-between, but they are together now and plan to marry. x3

Kids in my class started dating in fifth grade. I see nothing wrong with it, it's not serious, they don't do anything. I think it's harmless and kids should be able to if they like someone experience it and have fun before the drama starts. I say who cares. And 6th grade isn't even that young.

like u i'm in 6th.people r just trying to act 'all that' ignore it all,trust me there is more drama at my school than urs(no offence)

anyway just ignore it all,they're just trying to b cool

That's going strong in my school.

Pretty much 80% of the seventh graders are "dating".

I understand, because everyone hears so much about celebrities hooking up, and lots of movies and books about that kind of thing, but it's not like they can even do anything.

They can't go on an actual date, they probably never see each other outside of school, and none of that touchy-feely-lovey-dovey stuff goes unpunishable in school.

I don't have anything against it, but I don't have any understanding of the concept at all.

I personally plan on waiting to date at least until I could be allowed to get dropped off at a movie without a chaperone.

In my district the usual start for dating age is around 9-10, but it all depends and popularity. But I'm not saying I agree with that. The start of dating age should be 13-15 and/or 8th or 9th grade. For our school in the 6th grade, dating doesn't really depend on friendship or anything, it's more of looks and popularity. Example: Kayla B. was on facebook saying she was going out w/Justin and I know for a fact that those two have never talked to eachother, or even like eachother. I'm disappointed, but sadly, it's so common, I'm even doing it. I just met Zach and we're going out. But I DO like to get to know them before dating pops up.

Basically, if you want to tell her, then fine. But if you want to stay out of popularity or gossip trouble, I would back away. I'm already in that sort of mess, because my friend Charlotte asked me if I could ask Zach(not my Zach) out for her, and he said no, and she's peeved at me now for asking him. If you like that Mitchell dude so much, why don't you just tell him? That's what I do. Good luck staying outta trouble!

To everyone saying it's harmless: I don't think it is harmless. When they "break up," kids, especially the girls, can get extremely upset about it. I know I did.

Okay, I both agree and disagree with dating in 6th grade.

I agree because what's the harm? It's not like they'll make out, or go on actual candle-lit dinner dates, and stuff like that. I mean, I had my first date when I was in grade 2. (at 7 years old) Me and Michael (my "boyfriend") didn't do anything together. (Although once he kissed me on the cheek.) He came over to my house once, and we just played like I normally would if I had a friend over. The only thing I got from this "dating" experience, was the right to say "I have a boyfriend!" which, honestly, is a stupid thing to go around saying anyway.

I don't agree with dating in 6th grade because we all know children can be cruel. I got dumped several times last year in grade 6. The first: Parker dumped me and ADMITTED he was playing me! The second: Anthony actually told my crush to tell me that he broke up with me. And then, to my face, he's like "It's OVER!" and slammed a door in my face. ._. And then (this isn't really a brake up, but it's embarrassing) In grade 1, during the summer at swimming lessons, I was dating Kyle because he was this lovable, funny geek. And when swimming lessons was over, Maddy, Mal, and Tay were using fake-sympathy on me all "Aww, you can't see him again!" but then in grade 5, Kyle came to our school. We know we both want to go out, but we know people can be cruel (especially the girls in our class, and not to mention David and JC) and there's this HUGE untrue rumor in our school that we made-out. So as you can see, people can be cruel. If a guy dumps a girl, the girl will probably be depressed or upset for weeks. Most likely.