Paisley 520
Well-known member
The Old Man
On a hot day, an old man woke from his nap. “My back!” He groaned. His back had been aching from his daily two hour nap.
“Harold, get me a glass of water!” His wife squeaked.
“Get it yourself!” He whispered in a hoarse voice.
Harold picked up his cane and started out the door. Then, all of a sudden, his wife came up to him and grabbed Harold’s cane right out of his old, dry hands. Poor Harold tripped and fell.
“Dag Nabbed, what in tarnation was that for?!” Yelled Harold.
“Next time you get my darn drink!” Martha said.
Harold grabbed his cane and slammed the door shut. He saw his trees, but they were covered with toilet paper. He must have forgotten his glasses, because he didn’t make any fuss about it.
As Harold entered the grocery store, he spotted an elderly friend of his.
“Bob!” Harold yelled.
Bob’s hearing aid was obviously turned down, because he didn’t hear a word.
Harold walked down the beauty isle, with pairs of eyes staring at him. It was obviously for his wife. He bought lip gloss, mascara and eye liner all for his wife. He had bought his essential foods and headed for the check-out counter.
As he loaded up his groceries in his old Ford truck, he grabbed his keys and started up the truck.
During the ride home, rocks kept flying into the cracked windows. It was a very bumpy ride. His wife had always mentioned to Harold about getting a new car, but he would always be mowing the lawn.
Poof! The old Ford had been spewing exhaust. Poof! “Aw crap. This piece of junk is breaking down on me!” Harold yelled. Then a red and shiny Mercedes drove next to the old Ford.
“Hey old man! Get a new car!” A boy yelled from the other car.
“Be quiet, you whippersnapper!” Yelled an angry Harold. The other car sped up and passed Harold.
When Harold got home, he was angry and mad. His wife ordered him to make her lunch, but he yelled few words that should not be mentioned.
Harold jumped at the sound of a plop on the side of his house. “What in tarnation?!” He got up and walked to the bulky front door. He slowly opened the door and… PLOP! He got egged! A few giggles could be heard, and the laughing kids ran away. Harold looked at the damage done on the side of his house, and called out his wife to come see.
“Martha, come out here and look at the mess!” Harold yelled.
“Oh my God! Harold! How come you did this?! Don’t you know any manners?” Harold yelled.
“But I didn’t!” Harold said.
“HAROLD! I’m gonna have you paint the roof pink for that attitude!” Yelled Martha.
“Dag nabbed! That’s it! I’m gonna go for a drive! You are insane, woman!” Harold madly yelled.
As Harold was driving to the nearest park, he caught sight of a McDonalds restaurant. He was wanting to go there.
“Aw, I shouldn’t go there. Martha will just complain to me about all this blubber I have. Now where’s the closest park?” Harold said. He took out his map and frantically searched it for any parks.
That's all I wrote for now, but I'm writing more now! Tell me what you think about it!
-Leah
On a hot day, an old man woke from his nap. “My back!” He groaned. His back had been aching from his daily two hour nap.
“Harold, get me a glass of water!” His wife squeaked.
“Get it yourself!” He whispered in a hoarse voice.
Harold picked up his cane and started out the door. Then, all of a sudden, his wife came up to him and grabbed Harold’s cane right out of his old, dry hands. Poor Harold tripped and fell.
“Dag Nabbed, what in tarnation was that for?!” Yelled Harold.
“Next time you get my darn drink!” Martha said.
Harold grabbed his cane and slammed the door shut. He saw his trees, but they were covered with toilet paper. He must have forgotten his glasses, because he didn’t make any fuss about it.
As Harold entered the grocery store, he spotted an elderly friend of his.
“Bob!” Harold yelled.
Bob’s hearing aid was obviously turned down, because he didn’t hear a word.
Harold walked down the beauty isle, with pairs of eyes staring at him. It was obviously for his wife. He bought lip gloss, mascara and eye liner all for his wife. He had bought his essential foods and headed for the check-out counter.
As he loaded up his groceries in his old Ford truck, he grabbed his keys and started up the truck.
During the ride home, rocks kept flying into the cracked windows. It was a very bumpy ride. His wife had always mentioned to Harold about getting a new car, but he would always be mowing the lawn.
Poof! The old Ford had been spewing exhaust. Poof! “Aw crap. This piece of junk is breaking down on me!” Harold yelled. Then a red and shiny Mercedes drove next to the old Ford.
“Hey old man! Get a new car!” A boy yelled from the other car.
“Be quiet, you whippersnapper!” Yelled an angry Harold. The other car sped up and passed Harold.
When Harold got home, he was angry and mad. His wife ordered him to make her lunch, but he yelled few words that should not be mentioned.
Harold jumped at the sound of a plop on the side of his house. “What in tarnation?!” He got up and walked to the bulky front door. He slowly opened the door and… PLOP! He got egged! A few giggles could be heard, and the laughing kids ran away. Harold looked at the damage done on the side of his house, and called out his wife to come see.
“Martha, come out here and look at the mess!” Harold yelled.
“Oh my God! Harold! How come you did this?! Don’t you know any manners?” Harold yelled.
“But I didn’t!” Harold said.
“HAROLD! I’m gonna have you paint the roof pink for that attitude!” Yelled Martha.
“Dag nabbed! That’s it! I’m gonna go for a drive! You are insane, woman!” Harold madly yelled.
As Harold was driving to the nearest park, he caught sight of a McDonalds restaurant. He was wanting to go there.
“Aw, I shouldn’t go there. Martha will just complain to me about all this blubber I have. Now where’s the closest park?” Harold said. He took out his map and frantically searched it for any parks.
That's all I wrote for now, but I'm writing more now! Tell me what you think about it!
-Leah
