Fatal.Love
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- Oct 14, 2007
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I was bored, and began working on a story. I think it's going pretty well so far, but I wanted to know what other people's thoughts on it are.
This is just chapter one, and I haven't thought up a title for it yet, so if you have any suggestions, feel free to post them.
Honest comments are appreciated. :] Thanks!
Chapter 1
Riley leaned back in her chair, her eyes focused on the one page in her spiral notebook that was filled with drawings.. Mostly doodles she had done during Social Studies class. She looked up as the bell rang, gathering her things and quickly walking out to her locker.
"Riley!" She looked up suddenly, searching the pod for the person who had said her name.
Zach walked over to her, his backpack already slung carelessly over one shoulder.
"Oh. Hey, Zach." She stuffed her binder, textbook, and a novel she was supposed to be doing a book report on in her backpack, slipped her arms through the straps, and walked with him.
Out the doors and onto the bus, they talked about their day. They had no classes together, but it didn't matter much because they lived across the street from one another and saw eachother every day.
Riley sat down in the window seat before he had a chance. He laughed and sat down next to her, smiling.
"How come it's always you who gets the window seat?" He asked teasingly.
Riley laughed. "Fine!" She crawled across his lap and switched with him. "Happy?"
Zach grinned. "I was joking anyway!" He laughed.
As the bus unloaded, they came to the last stop and got off together, walking down the road. As they approached their houses, both stopped.
Riley looked at her house, then at Zach. "Get online tonight so we don't have to get on the phone again. My arm almost fell off the other day."
Zach chuckled. "Alright. Talk to you later."
With a wave, they both went opposite directions to their houses.
Riley sighed as she set her bag down and collapsed onto her bed, glancing between her computer and her bookbag. Taking her homework out, she rushed through math, using a calculator anyway, read a chapter of the novel and quickly summarized it, and left her Social Studies book as it was.
She sat down at her computer, opening up an IM window and signing in as -Riley.J-. Zach was already there and waiting.
-Riley.J- : Hey. Sorry, I had homework
ZKS-92 : No problem. I was just talking to Andrew anyway
-Riley.J- : Oh OK
ZKS-92 : Anything interesting?
-Riley.J- : Nothing yet
-Riley.J : BRB
Rapid knocking on her door told Riley that dad was home. She closed the window and hurried over to open the door.
Her father staggered in, obviously drunk, despite the fact that it was mid-day. Of course. She had forgotten that it was his day off.
"Yes?" She said quietly.
He hit her across the face. It stung terribly, bringing tears to her eyes already. "You know what you call me, don't you?" He shouted. "SIR!" With another strike, he pushed her back. "I saw you walking home with that boy again. I thought I told you not to be near him."
Riley struggled to keep her voice calm. "But he lives right across the street, we ride the same b-"
He hit her again. "I didn't ask for your explanations!" He bellowed. His breath smelled strongly of beer.
Tears now streamed down Riley's face. Her voice wavered as she spoke. "Yes, sir.." It was barely a whisper.
Her father glared at her. "I don't want you near him, or have anything to do with any boys. I know what they're like. I was one of them. And I know what they can do to you, little girl."
She bit back everything she wanted to say to him, to protest. "I won't go near him, sir.." She tried her hardest to sound as convincing as possible.
He turned to leave, murmuring something that sounded like a 'You'd better not, or I'll..' She didn't hear the rest. He staggered out her bedroom door, leaving her to close it.
She leaned against the door, sinking down to sitting, whimpering to hold back sobs. She wiped the tears away from her face and slowly walked back to the computer.
-Riley.J- : I'm back.
ZKS-92 : What was that about?
-Riley.J- : Dad came to tell me he was home.
This is just chapter one, and I haven't thought up a title for it yet, so if you have any suggestions, feel free to post them.
Honest comments are appreciated. :] Thanks!
Chapter 1
Riley leaned back in her chair, her eyes focused on the one page in her spiral notebook that was filled with drawings.. Mostly doodles she had done during Social Studies class. She looked up as the bell rang, gathering her things and quickly walking out to her locker.
"Riley!" She looked up suddenly, searching the pod for the person who had said her name.
Zach walked over to her, his backpack already slung carelessly over one shoulder.
"Oh. Hey, Zach." She stuffed her binder, textbook, and a novel she was supposed to be doing a book report on in her backpack, slipped her arms through the straps, and walked with him.
Out the doors and onto the bus, they talked about their day. They had no classes together, but it didn't matter much because they lived across the street from one another and saw eachother every day.
Riley sat down in the window seat before he had a chance. He laughed and sat down next to her, smiling.
"How come it's always you who gets the window seat?" He asked teasingly.
Riley laughed. "Fine!" She crawled across his lap and switched with him. "Happy?"
Zach grinned. "I was joking anyway!" He laughed.
As the bus unloaded, they came to the last stop and got off together, walking down the road. As they approached their houses, both stopped.
Riley looked at her house, then at Zach. "Get online tonight so we don't have to get on the phone again. My arm almost fell off the other day."
Zach chuckled. "Alright. Talk to you later."
With a wave, they both went opposite directions to their houses.
Riley sighed as she set her bag down and collapsed onto her bed, glancing between her computer and her bookbag. Taking her homework out, she rushed through math, using a calculator anyway, read a chapter of the novel and quickly summarized it, and left her Social Studies book as it was.
She sat down at her computer, opening up an IM window and signing in as -Riley.J-. Zach was already there and waiting.
-Riley.J- : Hey. Sorry, I had homework
ZKS-92 : No problem. I was just talking to Andrew anyway
-Riley.J- : Oh OK
ZKS-92 : Anything interesting?
-Riley.J- : Nothing yet
-Riley.J : BRB
Rapid knocking on her door told Riley that dad was home. She closed the window and hurried over to open the door.
Her father staggered in, obviously drunk, despite the fact that it was mid-day. Of course. She had forgotten that it was his day off.
"Yes?" She said quietly.
He hit her across the face. It stung terribly, bringing tears to her eyes already. "You know what you call me, don't you?" He shouted. "SIR!" With another strike, he pushed her back. "I saw you walking home with that boy again. I thought I told you not to be near him."
Riley struggled to keep her voice calm. "But he lives right across the street, we ride the same b-"
He hit her again. "I didn't ask for your explanations!" He bellowed. His breath smelled strongly of beer.
Tears now streamed down Riley's face. Her voice wavered as she spoke. "Yes, sir.." It was barely a whisper.
Her father glared at her. "I don't want you near him, or have anything to do with any boys. I know what they're like. I was one of them. And I know what they can do to you, little girl."
She bit back everything she wanted to say to him, to protest. "I won't go near him, sir.." She tried her hardest to sound as convincing as possible.
He turned to leave, murmuring something that sounded like a 'You'd better not, or I'll..' She didn't hear the rest. He staggered out her bedroom door, leaving her to close it.
She leaned against the door, sinking down to sitting, whimpering to hold back sobs. She wiped the tears away from her face and slowly walked back to the computer.
-Riley.J- : I'm back.
ZKS-92 : What was that about?
-Riley.J- : Dad came to tell me he was home.