Schnitzel the Toucan: A story of Toucans, unicorns, and shattered living rooms windows. By ApertureGotchi

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ApertureGotchi

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Once upon a time, there was a toucan named Schnitzel. He had a momma toucan, a papa toucan, and a baby sister toucan. He loved his family very much. Schnitzel and his family lived in the Rainforest. They were all very happy there. One day, Schnitzel was out on a little adventure around the rainforest. His goal was to count all the pink flowers he saw. Schnitzel went on this little adventure because he was very, berry, bored. He counted all the pink flowers. There were exactly 304,539 of them. Schnitzel picked 63 of the very best looking ones to bring home to Momma Toucan. Doing the math in his little toucan head, Schnitzel thought that now that he had taken 63 of the best pink flowers, there was only 304,476 pink flowers left. While he was flying and doing the math in his little toucan head, he wasn't looking where he was going. SMASH! Schnitzel crashed into a tree. Since he was a toucan, and lived in the canopy of the rainforest, he fell a long, long, way down. His little toucan head, being hit by the tree, was in lots of pain, but the pain doubled when his little toucan head hit the ground. Luckily for him, he blacked out. When he awoke, Papa Toucan was standing over him.

"Get up boy!" He said, "Or I'll knock your brains out!"

Schnitzel immediately informed him of his unfortunate injuries.

"Oh," said Papa Toucan, "I see. Your brains have already been knocked out. Well, we are jus gonna have to let that lil' boo-boo heal."

So Schnitzel and Papa Toucan flew home, and got an ice-pack on Schnitzel's head.

"What in da name of Santa-Maria happen to you?!" Asked Momma Toucan, "Lets get you into bed! Vamanos!"

"Oh, my head." Complained Schnitzel.

"Quit yur whinin, boy!" Yelled Papa Toucan!

"Schmittdley diddly bob chreckers!" Shrieked Baby Toucan, who hadn't learnt to talk yet.

Schnitzel gratefully climbed into his hammock, which was made of leaves and bits of twine. He let out a sigh of exhaustion, and fell into a deep sleep.

When Schnitzel awoke, his head was feeling much better. He pranced into the kitchen. The family was enjoying breakfast.

"Good morning!" Said Schnitzel.

No one paid any attention to him, except for Baby Toucan, who threw a wingful of her fruit-loops at him and giggled hysterically. But that was normal for his family. Schnitzel took his seat, and prepared a bowl of fruit loops for himself. Papa Toucan was immersed in the Rainforest Gazette, Momma Toucan had her eyes glued to the television, watching the Today show. This was a typical morning in the Toucan household.

Suddenly, Baby toucan upset her bowl of fruit loops and her glass of orange juice. "Boosh gabba watamibay!" She said, to nobody in particular.

"Schnitzel, would you clean dat up, por favor?" Asked Momma Toucan.

"Okay," Schnitzel replied. He then proceeded to wipe Baby Toucan's face, mop up the soggy fruit loops and orange juice on the floor, and get Baby Toucan a sippy cup with more orange juice.

After breakfast, Papa Toucan flew off to work and Momma Toucan said she had to do some shopping, so asked Schnitzel to please watch Baby Toucan until she got back.

Schnitzel, his head hurting from yesterday's accident, went to the freezer to grab a new ice pack. He put Baby Toucan in her playpen and she promptly picked up her stuffed penguin and began to chew on it.

Just as Schnitzel returned from the kitchen with his ice pack, a giant flying unicorn burst through the window! CRASH! Schnitzel, his eyes as big as grapefruits, stared at the mythical beast. "Umm... Hi," He said, "You kind of just broke our living room window there."

"I am the mystical unicorn known as Mushroom!" the unicorn said, "I have come to ask your help, Schnitzel, to save the whole entire all-inclusive planet earth! Quick, grab Baby Toucan and hop onto my back! We have little time to spare!"

Having always fantasized about something like this happening, Schnitzel grabbed Baby Toucan and hopped onto Mushroom's back without question.

As they were flying across the ocean, Schnitzel asked Mushroom what would his parents think when they returned and the children were both gone and the living room window was in shattered fragments on the carpet. Mushroom replied that messengers had been sent to inform their parents about this sudden change of events.

They flew on and on across the ocean, and Mushroom informed Schnitzel and Baby Toucan of the state of the whole entire all-inclusive planet earth. Apparently, large nuclear blasts had come from somewhere and tons and tons of people and animals were dying and needed their help.

"But I can't help!" Protested Schnitzel, "I have a lump on my head the size of a watermelon!"

"Well of course you do, silly," said Mushroom, "I used my unicorn powers to make you bump into the tree. It was a magical tree. It gave you magical powers to save the whole entire all-inclusive planet earth with. These powers include laser vision, the touch of health, which can heal someone just by touching them, and the powers of general magic, to use spells and things like that. Best of all, you get to keep these powers for the rest of your life, and even better yet, pass them on to your children! You'll be a family of SuperToucans!"

"Wow," was all Schnitzel could say. After a while he added "And... but... how?... what about Baby Toucan?"

"Oh I gave her powers, too. That penguin she was chewing on? It was magic. Now she has all the powers you do! So you guys have to save the whole entire all-inclusive planet earth!"

The trio finally arrived at the war zone and began helping to save the whole entire all-inclusive planet earth. After a couple of days, the whole entire all-inclusive planet earth was saved. The Toucan children went back to the rainforest where there was a party in celebration of their success. Momma Toucan had prepared some delicious home-style empanadas, cake, and fruit punch for the occasion and everyone was happy that the whole entire all-inclusive planet earth was saved and not destroyed.

The End

:)


 
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