V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)
Name: Kelle
Gender: F
Character type: Horoyotchi
Age: 7 years
Gen: 46
Job: Bus Driver
Status: Has a kid now
V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):
Name: Jazz
Gender: F
Character type: Hitodetchi
Age: 0 years
Gen: 4
Job: Preschooler
Status: Wants to do a song and dance number
Tama-Go Status (White)
Name: Cosgrove
Gender: M
Character type: Wooltchi
Age: 7 years
Gen: 17
Friendship: 5/6
Status: Is amazed by the sizelyness of this update
Jazz: I thought boys could only marry girls. At least that's what my teacher told me.
Airon: Well, some governments place restrictions on that sort of thing, yes, but when it comes to love things like gender don't matter.
Ryyx: The problem is there's some shallow jerks *coughdadcough* that don't seem to get that.
Airon: I think we're making progress, though, right?
Ryyx: I don't think so. Dad is as stubborn as a mule, and Mom just goes along with everything he says. As always.
Jazz: Maybe you should convince him that Airon is right for you with a song and dance number!
Ryyx: No one does those in real life.
FKOD: Even though it'd be awesome if they did.
Ryyx: Well, Dad hates musicals.
Jazz: That monster!
FKOD: Hey, didn't you tell me at one point that Aparus was a friend of your father's? Wouldn't the fact that Airon is his nephew have some effect on his opinion about this whole dealie?
Ryyx: Well, color me impressed, FKOD, you actually remembered something I told you from a previous conversation!
FKOD: Do I get a prize?
Ryyx: No. Anyways, to answer your other question, it doesn't give us much leverage, really. I imagine that Aparus himself could talk some sense into him... but I can't get a hold of him. I have no idea where he went off to.
Jazz: Let's search for him!
Airon: Where would we start?
Jazz: Well, your his nephew, you should know. Where does he live?
Airon: We already checked his house several times. He's not there.
Jazz: Well, what's the point of having a house if he doesn't live in it?
Airon: He really like traveling.
Cosgrove: So does FKOD's grandpa, but he's home sometimes.
Airon: He really likes traveling.
Cosgrove: Has he ever told you where he's going?
Airon: No.
???: I can tell you where he is.
Ryyx: Who are you?
FKOD: Why do these people just randomly show up at my house, anyways? I don't get it.
Prince of Hearts: I'm the Prince of Hearts.
Ryyx: Hm... have I heard that before?
POH: I believe you've met my pupil.
FKOD: Oh, you're that one guy.
POH: Indeed.
Airon: You know my uncle?
POH: I know many people.
Jazz: Are you popular?
POH: I suppose you could say that.
Kelle: I've never heard of you.
POH: Nor have I heard of you.
Mr. Margleton: Hey guys, I felt a strong demonic presence up here. Is everything okay? Hey, who are you?
POH: My name is the Prince of Hearts. And you?
Mr. Margleton: I'm Mr. Margleton, resident angel.
POH: It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Margleton.
Mr. Margleton: *nods* Just so you know, I'll have to watch you. It's my duty as an angel to monitor the activities of a powerful demon such as yourself.
POH: Very well, I understand.
Jazz: I thought that demons and angels didn't get along.
Mr. Margleton: Well, we don't, but we have to respect each other. If we were fighting constantly, the universe would eventually be torn apart. Neither side wants that.
Cosgrove: I know I don't.
Ryyx: We're getting off subject. Where's Aparus?
POH: He's been imprisoned.
Airon: What?! By who?
POH: Me.
Airon: Y-you?!
Mr. Margleton: Er, holding a mortal hostage counts as a reportable offense.
POH: Oh, but this little mortal tried to kill me. But I can't kill anyone anymore, so I just locked him away.
Cosgrove: Couldn't you have just told him to stop?
Ryyx: And what was that about not being able to kill anymore?
POH: Do you want to know why I'm called the Prince of Hearts? Well, you see, I eat hearts. But after taking so many lives, the archangel Miloniel stepped in and cursed me so that I may never take a life again, directly or indirectly. This curse could only be broken by consuming the heart of an immortal... so I sent my servant to collect one.
FKOD: Something about that sounds familiar...
POH: If you were thinking of Rhian's heart, then yes, you've seen my servant.
FKOD: The little grim reaper dude! Hey, he got her heart, why didn't your curse get broken?
POH: Because Aparus killed my servant. So I watched him. And then I plotted my revenge. I convinced the scientist and his immortal ally to betray you and absorb the powers of Esthis.
FKOD: Why didn't you just imprison him in the first place?
POH: Because you lost your greatest allies at that point, correct?
FKOD: Oh. Okay. But why does it matter what sort of allies we have?
POH: Because it is prophesied that Ryyx and Aparus will lead a small army to destroy me.
Mr. Margleton: Just so you know, a lot of this stuff you're doing is really evil so I'm going to have to--
POH: *grabs Margleton* Silence.
Mr. Margleton: Mrph!
POH: *tosses Margleton to the side*
FKOD: Woah, dude, not cool. No one treats Mr. Margleton like that!
POH: And what will you do about it?
FKOD: Well, you see... Battydoken! *Hadoukens Ninja Batty Shogun Ugly Doll at POH*
POH: Ah. Of course.
FKOD: I've got more where that came from! Go, Somy!
Somy: ?
FKOD: Somy, use Psychic!
Somy: *gives FKOD a look*
FKOD: What are you waiting for? He's a bad guy.
Mr. Margleton: He probably senses his power...
POH: I have no time for this. I may not be able to end your life, Ryyx, but I can imprison you.
Airon: No!
POH: And what will you do to stop me? I do recall you being unarmed as of late.
Airon: *pulls out fancy new guns* Not quite. Now leave Ryyx alone!
Ryyx: A-Airon!
POH: How cute. But the prophecy must hold true, so you can't kill me.
FKOD: Maybe we should beat him with a rolled up newspaper instead.
Airon: I don't care about the prophecy! I'll protect Ryyx even if it costs me my life.
Kelle: Haven't you been paying attention? He can't kill you either.
Airon: Oh, right. Well, still, you can't have Ryyx! *shoots at POH*
POH: *blocks with a magic shield* Oh, magic bullets. Quite a fine pair of firearms you have, but little can pierce through my defenses.
FKOD: Hey, Prince of Hearts, can we take a break from all this drama? I need to do the fun fact.
POH: Make it quick.
FKOD: Awesomesauce. Did you know: the tradition of wearing a wedding ring on the ring finger of the left hand dates back to Egyptian times, where it was thought that the vein of love ran from that finger directly to the heart.
POH: Are you done now?
FKOD: Wait. I think I know how to defeat you.
POH: Make it quick.
FKOD: Okay! I challenge you to a riddle contest!
POH: No.
FKOD: But--
POH: No.
FKOD: D:
Airon: *shoots POH in the head*
POH: Nice shot. Too bad headshots don't kill me. *punches Airon in the gut*
Ryyx: Airon! That's it, you're going down, you #$%@#%&!
FKOD: Hey, no swearing on the log! Also Ryyx he's going to kidnap you maybe you should have ran away while Airon was distracting him so his efforts wouldn't be in vain.
POH: *punches Ryyx in the face* Indeed.
Cosgrove: Hey. Cut that out.
POH: ...Why should I?
Cosgrove: Because I told you to. Anyways, you have Aparus locked up, why do you need to imprison Ryyx?
POH: Because he might mount a rescue mission.
Kelle: Hey, if you didn't come here, we wouldn't have even known about you actually being evil and stuff.
POH: I came because one of my minions decided to betray me. She's on her way here as we speak. Since I have no way of disposing of her, I intended to take Ryyx away before she can warn you.
????: *runs in* Guys! The Prince of Hearts is evil! He kidnapped some dude named Aparus!
FKOD: Yeah, we know.
????: Oh. Crap.
POH: Hello, Tari.
Tari: Oh. Nice to see you, Prince of Hearst. Kidnappin' more people? Who do you think you are, Candle-- wait, I shouldn't say that.
POH: I was about to leave. You should stay here, Tari, since you've obviously decided to side with these fools.
Tari: Hm. Hmmmmmmm. I might have to call the angel cops on you. Maybe they can't make you dead but they can keep you from kidnapping boys. Why do you need boys? Boys are silly. I mean really, just look at the new guy.
POH: I'm the only one who can restore your humanity, though. If I'm sealed away, there's no possible way for me to do that, is there?
Tari: ...Fine. I won't call the angel cops. Now restore my humanity. Being a demon stinks.
*some angel cops burst in*
Angel Cop 1: Hands in the air!
AC2: Drop your weapons!
AC3: Everyone freeze!
AC1: Oh man, that was cool, bursting in like human cops. Okay, in all seriousness... Miss Tari Diran?
Tari: 'Sup.
Kelle: I thought you said you weren't going to call them.
Tari: Yeah. Uh.... when did I call those guys... OH RIGHT, FIVE FREAKING MINUTES AGO. Rightio. Wait, why wasn't I going to call them?
Kelle: I never thought I'd see someone more forgetful than FKOD.
FKOD: Hey. >:|
AC2: Ah, the Prince of Hearst.
POH: Hearts.
AC3: We got the wrong guy?
AC2: Wait... there's no demon called the Prince of Hearst. But there is a Prince of Hearts.
AC1: So this is the kidnapper, hm?
AC2: Yes. It seems that this is one of those demons that trick people into thinking they've embraced a moralistically inclined way of life.
AC3: Tricky little monster.
Jazz: So are you taking the Prince of Hearts to angel jail?
AC1: No. We're going to have to write up a report and send it to our superiors and then this will get squared away in a couple of days.
Jazz: Why can't you just take him to angel jail?
AC2: Us? Oh, we can't do that. The Prince of Hearts is a class C-24 demon, and we're only class I-14 angels.
AC3: In other words, he's way stronger than we are.
POH: Hehehe...
Jazz: Why are you laughing?
POH: A few days is all I need.
AC1: For what?
POH: I'm not telling you.
AC1: Aw, come on.
POH: No.
AC1: :<
POH: *teleports away*
Cosgrove: He got away.
AC2: Don't worry. I already have all the data I need. Analyzing demons is my specialty. I just need to ask Miss Tari Diran some questions.
Tari: ...
AC2: Miss Diran, what is your boss--
Tari: HE DIDN'T TURN ME BACK. THAT LYING SON OF A HAMSTER WHEEL.
AC2: Uh, I understand you're under stress, but--
Tari: I'm going to kill that little brat, just you wait. Okay, what was that prophecy... had to be killed by an army led by... some guys... or something...
FKOD: Ryyx and Aparus.
Tari: YES. THANK YOU. I gotta find these guys!
FKOD: Well, Ryyx is laying unconscious on the floor, and Aparus is the dude that the Prince of Hearts kidnapped.
Tari: Ah. I knew I should have taken that guy with me. Oh well, I still have the keys to the cell with me. So, now I need an army. Okay, I'mma recruit you, that guy, those little critters, that blob with the dude in it, and that tentacle guy.
FKOD: Don't recruit the tentacle guy, he's terrible.
Dr. Blobagus: I don't want to join the boy scouts. I don't need badges.
Tari: But... you could contribute to your community! By killing a demon prince!
Dr. Blobagus: Not interested. I have to feed my new dog.
Jazz: New dog?
Dr. Blobagus: Yes. *puts bowl of food in front of dog plushie* He hasn't been eating lately.
Tari: You know what? I really like you, you should join my army. C'mon, everyone else is.
Jazz: Not really. You didn't even ask us if we were okay with that.
Tari: Well, you know what? You're a Christmas tree topper and I'm an oak tree, so don't tell me what to do.
Jazz: Uh, what?
Tari: I actually had no idea where that metaphor was going. Anyways, you're in my army whether you like it or not, so get used to it, Starfy.
Jazz: My name is Jazz.
Tari: Alright, Louis Armstrong. Let's bust out Aparsusus... whatever you call him.
Cosgrove: What's the plan?
Tari: We go in. We get him out. We come back and teach Ryyx and Aparus the way of the boyscouts-- I mean, generals. In armies.
FKOD: Can we do that tomorrow? A lot happened today and I'm tired.
Tari: Sleep is for the weak and lazy.
FKOD: I am weak and lazy.
Tari: Oh. Well, good night.
AC2: So, will you answer my questions now, Miss Diran?
Tari: Questions? Sure. Whatever. Hey, you, stop typing, you have to rest.
FKOD: 'Kay.