Funny Jokes! :D

[`Krystal]

^ I know. We told her she was nuts and she started crying. D':

We laugh about it nowadays. x3

 

[>...Missbehave...<]

This is immature but...

There were two men in a RAF plane. The plane was overloaded, so they dropped two guns and a bomb. When they landed they went into the town to see where the stuff went. They saw a little girl who was crying then asked her, "What's wrong?" then the girl said, "Some one shot my cat!" so they went further then saw a boy crying and asked what was wrong and he said, "Some one shot my dog!" so they went even further and saw another boy. But this boy wasn't crying, he was laughing his head off so they asked him what was so funny then he said, "I farted and my house blew up!"

(Joke: The bomb landed in the boys house, and he farted next to it and set it off. I know o___o)

Oh, oh! I've got another one.

"Doctor doctor! I've got 59 seconds to live!"

"I'll be with you in a minute."

And one last one...

There was an English man, and Irish man and a Scottish man. One day they were visited by a wizard who said, "If you jump off a cliff while yelling something, you'll land in what you yell." So the English man jumped off the cliff and yelled "MONEY!!!" And landed in money. Then the Scottish man jumped off and yelled, "Marshmallows!!" and landed in marshmallows. Then the Irish man who hadn't been listening to the wizard fell off the cliff and yelled, "Aw, crap!" and....guess what he landed in!

Yeah...The rest of mine are probably X-rated.

 

[KuChIpATcHi LOLZ]

I HAVE ONE!!! im a comediant!

ehhrm

a teacher said to a student:

"Whats the name of Alaska s capital?"

and the student said:

"Juneau?"

and the teacher said:

"yes but i am asking you"

understood???

 

[megapatchi27]

heres one!

Why did Tiger stick his head in the toilet?

He was looking for Pooh! *laughs*

 

[animelover22]

A duck waddles into a bar and hops on a stool. The bartender, irritated, says, "What'll you have?"

The duck says, "Got any pickles?"

The bartender spits and says "We don't have pickles here, We serve drinks. Now get out!"

The duck hops off the stool and waddles out.

The next day, the same duck waddles into the same bar, hops on a stool, looks the bartender in the eye and asks, "Got any pickles?"

The bartender, irritated, says, "I told you yesterday we don't serve pickles here, we serve drinks, now GET OUT!"

The duck hops off the stool and waddles out.

The next days the same duck waddles into the same bar and hops on a stool, looks at the bartender, and asks: "Got any pickles?"

The bartender, infuriated, POUNDS his fist on the bar and yells at the duck. "I told you two times we don't serve pickles here, we serve drinks! If you ask me ONE MORE TIME, I'm going to nail your beak to the bar! NOW GET OUT!"

With that the duck shrugged, hopped off the stool, and waddled out.

The next day, the same duck waddled into the same bar, hopped on a stool, looked the bartender in the eye and asked: "Got any nails?"

The bartender, puzzled, said "No."

The duck then looked him square in the eye and said, "Got any pickles?"

Ur Hur..

 

[Mametchi_411]

I'll have to say that "Wise Quotes" are really funny. Here's some:

Those who criticize our generation forget who raised it.

It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father.

Stop being so stupid.. it’s my turn.

Gotta luv those.