...Guilt?

[happi bunny]

Hey guys,

I've never posted here asking for advice before, mostly because I like to figure things out on my own. But this is something I can't figure out, no matter how hard I try.

Well, I'm an emotional person. I don't just get sad, I bawl and bawl until I have no moisture to spare for tears. And I don't just get mad, I scream until I get my way. I've been on an emotional roller coaster for years, and I've learned to express my emotions freely.

But for the past few days, I haven't been able to eat or sleep. I've been vomiting, even though I'm not ill. It's taken me a while, but I finally identified the problem. I feel guilty, and I don't know why.

It's that feeling you get in the pit of your stomach when you know you've done something wrong. But I don't know what I've done to stir this feeling.

I know exactly when this started - Last Thursday. I woke up and felt like dying. I'm fairly sure I didn't do anything wrong. It's been a while since I've done something so terrible as to make me feel this way.

There's nothing from my past that has gone unresolved. I've been thinking about it all night, and I'm sure I haven't done anything wrong. So why would I be feeling guilty?

I've even gone so far as to weigh the things I haven't done wrong. Maybe I feel guilty for my mental disorders? Or maybe I feel bad for something that happened to a friend or family member? But I can't come up with the right answer.

I just need some help. I hate feeling like this. If you have any advice at all, I would greatly appreciate it. =)

Thanks so much,

Aye

 

[tamaw/pants]

Isn't that a depression thing, where you feel guilty for no reason? Make sure to mention it to your parents and you may want to visit your doctor just to check everything out.

Hope you feel better!

Oh, and BTW- there's nothing wrong with asking for advice. If you can learn from others, by all means learn. ;]

 

[happi bunny]

Hey, thanks for replying. =)

Yes, it does have something to do with depression. I just thought it was odd that I had never felt that way before. I was diagnosed with clinical depression five years ago, and, to the best of my knowledge, I've never felt guilty. I spoke to my therapist today, and he said I may be going through a new phase. I just want to be done with this already... >,>

[SIZE=6pt][/SIZE]

Edited for a grammatical error.. As always =O

 

[Trilby]

I know that throughout my years of dealing with major depression and anxiety disorder i go through different phases experiencing different symptoms of the disorders.

Im sure there is nothing you have to feel guilty about, it is just one of the joys of having a mental illness. Things change when you think you have everything figured out and under control. Good luck with it, but hopefully now that you know there isnt an actual reason to feel this way it may be easier to deal with this overwhelming feeling you are having.

 

[happi bunny]

Thanks for your input, Trilby, I appreciate it. =)

I do feel better already, like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Yes, that was rather quick... Probably my bipolar disorder speaking. v,V

Anyways. Thanks for your help, you two. I find that it is easier to deal with a problem when I know what's causing it.

 

[Trilby]

For sure, when you dont know what it going on it makes it even worse I think. Throws in another element on top of the issue.

 

[jappyx]

Thanks for your input, Trilby, I appreciate it. =)
I do feel better already, like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Yes, that was rather quick... Probably my bipolar disorder speaking. v,V

Anyways. Thanks for your help, you two. I find that it is easier to deal with a problem when I know what's causing it.

Good to hear its better.

You mentioned your therapist.. Good work on talking to them about it. They've likely know a lot about your depression and can possibly pin point where this guilt is coming from. If not, I'm sure they'll have some suggestions in order to make you feel better.

Good luck, I hope all gets better.

 

[DarkHeart]

It sounds like depression.

Even though you may not know it, depression usually makes people feel guilty or upset for unknown reasons.

Or perhaps some sort of mental disorder??

If your vomiting, not being able to sleep or eat...it's time to contact your family doctor.

And don't worry; I'm an emotional rollar coaster too. Most girls are...

 

[Rocken Sisters]

You know when somethings wrong. I felt Guilty and jealous when my only best friend who was a true dear was taken away from me. It turned alright in the end.

I'm glad to hear your better though.

 

[ColonelJ]

I know how you feel. I sometimes have bouts with mysterious guilt. It's okay though; It'll be gone soon.

Prehaps you feel guilty about the emotional "out-pourings" to your parents, and you feel as if you're being very disrespectful. I've done the same thing many times, and that's where the guilt comes in - it makes you not do it again.

Now, when I was a bit younger, I had a (now ex) step-mother and older step-sister that would blame all of my emotional ups and downs on hormones. They would say, "Oh, honey, you're so hormonal!" and would downright refuse to talk to me about anything. From that, I developed the habit of hiding my emotions and bottling stuff up until I would snap and scream at someone - often someone I loved. Could the problem be that you have been accused of being overly dramatic or just "hormonal?" Hormones are present, and do effect our emotions, but they are only a part of the equation. Yes, feelings do come with age.

It's also really smart and good that you recognize this as being a problem, and you want to figure things out for yourself.