Online Dating

[Bubbles11]

If the feelings are real, the relationship is probably real too. I've started many relationships either online, through IM or through texting, and most of them lasted for at least a few months. They're not always as fulfilling as one you might have with someone you met first in person or get to see frequently, but they can be legitimate. I know I've had a few that were almost exclusively online/not in person, and they were legitimate, though I understand where you're coming from. When you're in a relationship and you can see each other a lot, it's a lot better to be able to see them in person and develop that relationship when you're face to face (which is why Skype often helps.)

 

[jordboss]

Well, yes because that is how I met my boyfriend. It all started on Facebook, where he added me and we started talking, and grew closer and closer. Until one day I decided to meet him, lucky for me he lives 20 mins away on the train, although he is in England and I am in Wales. We have the best relationship and see each other 3 times a week

 

[Box]

(not a reply to previous post)

it's no different from a regular relationship

it just seems to be taken less seriously

but not by onlookers, relationship, no

the kids themselves aren't always taking it seriously

heck, they don't always seriously in person (there exist people on the Internet who take it more seriously than relationships away from keyboard, vice-versa)

so, when you ask if online dating is real dating

think about what you consider dating in the first place

if the relationship meets your criteria, fine... it's dating

but otherwise, don't ask

you never need to ask

_____

anyway, the important part is what the individual thinks

we're not here to change your views

 

[FairyWars9]

I honestly think it's a very bad idea. 88.9% of the time the photos some people post come from a simple search on Google. If you ask them for photos and they say no then that's a red flag right there. They can say their like 20 but in reality they could be over their 50's sometimes. And they say "You must be over 18" well theres people that fake their age and in private message say their actual age to that person. I think they need stricter standards like tell your credit card info and stuff like that so they know your actually an adult and not someone faking their age.

 

[TamaMum]

I honestly think it's a very bad idea. 88.9% of the time the photos some people post come from a simple search on Google. If you ask them for photos and they say no then that's a red flag right there. They can say their like 20 but in reality they could be over their 50's sometimes. And they say "You must be over 18" well theres people that fake their age and in private message say their actual age to that person. I think they need stricter standards like tell your credit card info and stuff like that so they know your actually an adult and not someone faking their age.

That may be true in part - but 88.9% of the time it's a very bad idea? - If someone you are dating online refuses to show you a photo, then of course you can be suspicious, but it is also not too difficult to work out that the relationship will not go too far down the line if you can't even trust each other to skype. Cams are so widely used, it is difficult to chat to your online date these days without them seeing exactly what you look like in real life

 

[Box]

lol, got some friends I know online that I've seen aboooooout thrice

 

[Midorime]

I have friends I see on camera every so often and whom I speak with voice chat a lot over different mediums.

If you're ever in doubt about a photo someone sends you, try this site: https://www.tineye.com/

 

[TamaMum]

I have had plenty of online friends where I never saw a photo - but dating - online dating - that's kind of different. It didn't exist when I was dating ( ) but I would have thought it sensible for anyone who gets to know someone so well that they are at a point in their relationship where they have romantic feelings and want to "date" each other that they not only see a photo of each other, but voice chat (you can tell alot about someone's age from their voice and conversations too) and of course use a camera / skype. If you think you know someone well enough to date online then you shouldn't be trying to hide who you are.

 

[Eternal Mametchi Fan]

Actually IDK what my online BF looks like and I've never video/voice chatted with him.

We can wait until the day we meet each other in real life.

 

[Box]

I've been contemplating visiting some online friends closer to home (not, like, this home, but another)

realized I probably would not do so if I hadn't seen them beforehand

not necessarily because I don't trust them, but I remember thinking, "oh, he/she hasn't shown their face? it's been six months, and I think that would be cool-ish"

the "probably would not" would probably because I would be doubting the validity of the friendship (seeing as I would most certainly be curious about their appearance, I'd definitely ask before the time came, i.e., a request would have to be rejected for reasons other than the initial shying away from the idea for me to start doubting the person in question)
^and that's only if I don't already know them extremely well (which is generally one of the only conditions under which I would ask in the first place)

I don't have anything against meeting someone you haven't seen (mainly because there are a multitude of exceptions and extenuating circumstances I'm sure you're thinking about right now), buuuut you usually get to see people before travelling however many miles it is to where they live.-.

-----

not to say you should show people your face a lot, either

I could count the individuals I've webcammed on one hand

knew all of them reasonably well

 

[TamaMum]

Actually IDK what my online BF looks like and I've never video/voice chatted with him.

We can wait until the day we meet each other in real life.

Aren't you even the teensiest bit curious as to what your online BF might look like given that you know him so well, speak with him pretty much every day and spend a lot of time planning your future together?

I only ask because it seems from everything you've said it is a very strong relationship and to be honest, it does seem strange that you have never wondered what he looks like - and he knows what you look like

 

[Carol_tama]

I agree with TamaMum. I would be VERY curious how he looks like. There are 3 options:
1) he's and old pedophile and doesn't want you to know (don't get angry, but might be)
2) he just might be ashamed of his appearance and think you wouldn't want him if you knew how he looks like
3) he's Batman


I met a boy online once, from my city and we talked quite a lot and then we met in real life (he was 1 year older than me) and we dated for about... 3 months? But considering the fact that I was 15 it was quite long for me then lol. xD

 

[Yoggs]

Of course there is that one other option that he is telling the truth about himself but he is just shy.

 

[Eternal Mametchi Fan]

Ugh! I hate the direction this topic is going. I should have thought of this before I posted lol. I just think all the posts are going to be interfering with my personal love life.

 

[The Ultimate Doomer]

We're not interfering, it's just that others want to be sure that your friend is honest.

 

[Kiruu]

My boyfriend and I met on an MMO we play three years ago so honestly I do believe online dating can work. There does need to be some face to face communication at some point though, such as through Skype. I don't regret meeting him even though the circumstances we met are different. I say, online dating isn't a bad thing, but if they do they should take some precaution. Communicating with them face to face I believe is vital at some point, and a friend or another adult should be present when meeting the other person (safety in numbers), should be done in a public place with lots of people around, and shouldn't be done until you're legally an adult.

 

[Midorime]

Ugh! I hate the direction this topic is going. I should have thought of this before I posted lol. I just think all the posts are going to be interfering with my personal love life.

Not trying to, but I think some people may just be worried about you is all. I find it strange how one can date but never know what the person looks like, and I would worry if he was a liar. We are just concerned for your safety and hope things work out the best for you and not the worst. Good luck.

 

[The Ultimate Doomer]

And also, I think the parents should always know about "online dating" (and dating in real life too)... Your parents should know if you have friendship like that, and should approve of the relationship and be sure that it is safe.

 

[Eternal Mametchi Fan]

Well I would prefer it if people mind their own business instead of making every post in this thread about me and my relationship. !_! You don't even know much about us and saying he could be a liar does not help. I was very good friends with him for a while before I had feelings for him so I have always trusted him, why should I feel any different just because he's my boyfriend now. .--. You have no idea what he's done for me and I can tell he cares so much for me. This is getting way too personal. >o<

**backs away into the corner of the room**

 

[SamJJE101]

The thing is, online dating has a bad stigma surrounding it because of all of the stories that we've all heard about girls (and guys) getting into online relationships, and then when they meet up they're actually some psycho serial killer that has been pretending to be someone else.

But that's only a very, very small part of the online dating world. You're not going to see news coverage over every successful online relationship.

I don't see anything wrong with them, assuming of course both parties are legit. As somebody else said, some online relationships can be more real than some local relationships.