I saw a video on youtube where a girl made a song using a song lyric generator for hilarious results. I wanted to try the same thing and when I found the website's poem generator, I instantly wanted to generate a Tamagotchi poem. The major problem was that the generator doesn't recognize non-standard words and thus couldn't really use "Tamagotchi" because it couldn't match it up with anything. And it also didn't do well with my standard, insane phrases - like "Grandma's teeth" - and instead replaced them with more sensible equivalents. So, having some literary talent, I decided I would modify them myself to be closer to what I actually wanted to create while still partially following the generator's formula. I made two of them and the words in [square brackets] are my modifications, while the rest are the generator and the selections it accepted. They even generated automatic reviews!
Just a note about the first, it references the "Penguin-keeper's got a network of penguin minions monitoring the Mod Break topic, ready to squawk and send us back to square one" in-joke. ("Squawk" is such a hard word to spell.)
And time to see the critic reviews:
Oh boy, wait till they read my next masterpiece! I actually put some effort into the modifications as it practically rejected all of my choices so I had to add them back and make them work.
And the critics loved it:
If this entertained you, why not rig up a poem yourself? Or maybe even a song or other form of writing from one of the other generators?
Just a note about the first, it references the "Penguin-keeper's got a network of penguin minions monitoring the Mod Break topic, ready to squawk and send us back to square one" in-joke. ("Squawk" is such a hard word to spell.)
[Tamagotchis]
by K. Ballad
I cannot help but stop and look at the Monochrome screen [subculture].
Does the [subculture] make you shiver?
does it?
Pay attention to the fact,
the fact is the most made in 1996 realness of all.
Does the fact make you shiver?
does it?
Just like a penguin minion squawking, is the failure.
Failure - the true source of squawk.
The yellow [beeping] sings like an abundance of cheap knock-offs
Never forget the chromatic and colored [beeping].
And time to see the critic reviews:
"[' Tamagotchis' ]is a topic far too neglected in modern poetry. I'm so glad K. Ballad chose to tackle it."
- The Daily Tale
"I will never forget chromatic and colored [beeping] thanks to the vivid imagery created by this author."
- Enid Kibbler
"I love poems that beg the reader to bring something to the table. K. Ballad brought [Tamagotchis] and I brought kittens. It made for quite a weird read, if I'm honest."
- Hit the Spoof
Oh boy, wait till they read my next masterpiece! I actually put some effort into the modifications as it practically rejected all of my choices so I had to add them back and make them work.
The Glitched Stranger At Japanese Nonsense - A Narrative Poem
by K. Ballad
One day at a Japan You Want shop,
I met a man selling [leveled gotchis, extra flat],
For money he wanted to swap,
But I really wanted some [Devilgotchis, extra matte].
"Got any [Devilgotchis]?" asked I.
"For that's how I'll spend my money."
"No [Devilgotchis] here!" said the guy.
He seemed to find it quite funny.
"We've got some lovely [weird stuff],
I'll give you a very fine price."
"I'd rather have some [geared stuff]."
The man blinked rapidly thrice.
The man seemed exceptionally [Kuchipatchi, kissy face and all],
And his manner was strangely [Tamatchi-d, like a smiling ball].
He wasn't what I would call [Kusatchi, no leaves squiggled],
Great disdain he noticeably [Zatchi-d, arms constantly wriggled].
Like others, he thought I was odd,
Some say I'm a bit [switched].
Still he gave me a courteous nod,
As if he thought I was plenty [glitched].
So in search of my goal I departed,
But before the Japan You Want shop could I leave,
The man came running full-hearted,
"I can help you I believe."
"[Leveled gotchis, Devilgotchis], you shall find.
[Grandma’s teeth, penguins beneath], you can get.
You must now open your mind,
And get down to Japanese Nonsense Market.
So to Japanese Nonsense Market I decided to go,
In search of the [Devilgotchis] I craved.
The winds it did eerily blow.
But I felt that the day could be saved.
There were stalls selling rings,
TamaTalkers in many shades.
There were even stalls selling wings
People were scattered from many trades
I was greeted by a peculiar lady,
She seemed to be rather [switched]
I couldn't help thinking she might be quite shady.
I wondered if she was at all [glitched].
Before I could open my mouth,
She shouted, "For you, I have some [Devilgotchis]!"
I headed towards her, to the south,
Past some [Granny teeth and leveled gotchis].
"But how did you know?" I asked,
"Do you want them or not?" she did say.
Silently, the [Devilgotchis] she passed.
Then vanished before I could pay.
As I walked away I [heard] a crackle
Or was it, perhaps, a hushed cackle?
And the critics loved it:
I have a feeling these people have little subcultural relevance as Enid Kibbler seems to be oblivious to the value of a Devilgotchi. And to that I demande, "Go educate yourself, normie!""Wow! I've always wanted to buy some [Devilgotchis] from a creepy witch!"
- The Daily Tale
"To truly appreciate this poem, you need to see it as a metaphor. I mean, literally wanting to spend all your money on some [Devilgotchis], really?"
- Enid Kibbler
"I love how to poet has used rhymes to bring this alive. [Weird stuff and geared stuff] - I mean, wow!."
- Hit the Spoof
If this entertained you, why not rig up a poem yourself? Or maybe even a song or other form of writing from one of the other generators?