I'm hiding in the oven and I steel the bacon. Then I run to Hetaliaverse and give the bacon to Germany, who defends it from all others because he's sexy and does what he wants. ^-^
Germany comes along and takes the bacon from her. Then Germany gives the bacon to me, and I hide it in a super secret metal safe that can only be opened with my iris code. Then I have my eyes destroyed so no one can ever get the bacon. The end.