The Amazing Adventures of a Tamagotchi

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Lena

Gender: F

Character type: Urazukyutchi

Age: 5 years

Gen: 45

Job: Weight Puller

Status: Currently Single

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Cat

Gender: F

Character type: Horoyotchi

Age: 7 years

Gen: 2

Job: Super fantastic balloon catcher

Status: Has her very own daughter now

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Camilla

Gender: F

Character type: Chamametchi

Age: 6 years

Gen: 16

Friendship: 5/6

Status: Married to a handsome Shimashimatchi

FKOD: Okay sorry about not updating yesterday, I got a Freakazoid DVD yesterday and my bro and I stayed up until midnight to watch it.

Cat: *sigh* You and your excuses.

FKOD: BUT GUESS WHAT. I went to a mall and guess who has two thumbs and got an Adventure Time T-shirt?

Lena: Your brother.

FKOD: Well. He did too, but I was referring to myself. So uh, anyways, my bro and I are going to watch more Freakazoid, so yeah, see ya later guys.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Lena

Gender: F

Character type: Urazukyutchi

Age: 7 years

Gen: 45

Job: Weight Puller

Status: Has a wee little baby

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Steph

Gender: F

Character type: Zouritchi

Age: 1 year

Gen: 3

Job: Sparkliness student

Status: Confused

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Camilla

Gender: F

Character type: Chamametchi

Age: 8 years

Gen: 16

Friendship: 5/6

Status: IT'S A BOY :0

FKOD: OKAY GUYS I'M DOING THE LOG.

Steph: Yeah?

FKOD: Yeah. Uh, are we going to talk about something in particular?

Steph: Idunno, are we?

FKOD: Well, I sure didn't plan this out.

*suddenly, a tear in the fabric of reality forms*

Dr. Blobagus: *pokes head through* FKOD, I have something important to ask you.

FKOD: Er. Okay.

Dr. Blobaugs: Does this scarf make me look fat?

Camilla: What scarf?

Dr. Blobagus: The one that I ate.

Lena: W-who are you? What are you doing here?

Dr. Blobagus: Now now, FKOD hasn't even answered my question.

FKOD: Yes, Blobagus, it makes you look like 18 pounds heavier. Gosh, go on a diet already.

Dr. Blobagus: Wow, I haven't received a compliment like that in years. Thank you, FKOD. *leaves and seals up tear behind him*

Steph: What was that all about?

FKOD: :\

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Kelle

Gender: F

Character type: Hitodetchi

Age: 0 years

Gen: 46

Job: Pre-schooler

Status:

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Steph

Gender: F

Character type: Zouritchi

Age: 1 years

Gen: 3

Job: Sparkliness student

Status:

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Camilla

Gender: F

Character type: Chamametchi

Age: 9 years

Gen: 16

Friendship: 5/6

Status:

Steph: Hm, I wonder what they're doing right now.

Kelle: Who?

Steph: Oh, FKOD's friends.

Camilla: Well, it's summer vacation, and they're probably doing vacationy stuff.

Steph: No, the ones that are on the log all the time.

Camilla: Oh. Well, I bet they're on adventures or something.

Kelle: Uh, well, I haven't read the log. So... um... am I going to have to meet these people when we go to FKOD's house?

Camilla: Yup.

Kelle: Are they good people?

Steph: Well, from what I can tell from the log, Ryyx isn't very bright, Mr. Margleton is an angel so he's okay, Tiny Optimus Prime is a super hero which is cool, Dr. Blobagus is weird, Epere is sort of a jerk, Airon is okay, Itty Bitty Batman is full of himself, Ramada is like Robin Hood or something I guess, Kinene is nice, Terry is nosy, Guy Fox likes newspapers, and Justin Beiber has issues.

FKOD: Justin Beiber has only been briefly mentioned, why do you think he lives at my house, what is wrong with you, I don't even.

Steph: I was kind of hoping I wasn't forgetting someone so I mentioned him so no one would notice. There are so many people just hanging around your house, FKOD.

Kelle: I thought FKOD was too awkward and lame to be popular.

FKOD: What gave you that idea?

Kelle: Camilla told me that.

Camilla: No I didn't. It was Tommy.

Tommy (Camilla's wife): Nuh uh. It was Junior.

Camilla: I thought we were going to name him Cosgrove!

Tommy: No, he should be Junior.

Camilla: No, Junior is not an original name at all.

Tommy: Well it's not like you came up with that name yourself! Cosgrove is a name from Freakazoid!

Camilla: Well, I already taught him some stuff that he says on the show...

Cosgrove/Junior/I don't even know: I want a can of hash and some coffee.

Camilla: See?

FKOD: Does he say anything else?

Cosgrove: I want a can of hash and some coffee.

Camilla: ...No.

FKOD: You know, I thought that the first phrase he would have learned was, "Hey. Cut that out."

Camilla: That's being a surprisingly difficult endeavor.

Cosgrove: I want a can of hash and some coffee.

Kelle: Hey. Cut that out.

Cosgrove: Hey. Cut that out.

Camilla: :0

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Kelle

Gender: F

Character type: Urayoungmarotchi

Age: 1 year

Gen: 46

Job: Smiley Face Student

Status: Dissapointed in FKOD forever

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Steph

Gender: F

Character type: Zouritchi

Age: 2 years

Gen: 3

Job: Sparkliness student

Status: Curious as always

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Cosgrove

Gender: M

Character type: Ahirukutchi

Age: 0 years

Gen: 17

Friendship: 2/6

Status: Wants a can of hash and some coffee

FKOD: Whoops forgot to fill in the status thingies yesterday.

Kelle: Shame on you, miss.

FKOD: :<

Steph: Hey, FKOD, what's your home like?

FKOD: Creaky and not especially well-built.

Steph: Oh. Anything else I should know?

FKOD: It's also a hive of scum and villainy.

Steph: 'Kay.

Cosgrove: So we're going there tomorrow?

FKOD: Yep.

Kelle: I'm scared.

FKOD: Don't worry, I'll keep you safe.

Kelle: Now I'm really scared.

FKOD: :|

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Kelle

Gender: F

Character type: Horoyotchi

Age: 4 years

Gen: 46

Job: Bus Driver

Status: Not a good influence

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Steph

Gender: F

Character type: Tsukkomitchi

Age: 6 years

Gen: 3

Job: Silverware expert

Status: Trying to be comforting

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Cosgrove

Gender: M

Character type: Wooltchi

Age: 4 years

Gen: 17

Friendship: 5/6

Status: Having an identity crisis

Cosgrove: *sigh*

Steph: Cosgrove, what's wrong?

Cosgrove: I'm terrible at being Cosgrove.

Steph: What? No you're not. Your Ed Asner impression is really good!

Cosgrove: But when I tell people to cut it out, they don't! And I don't have a friend who's a superhero and I'm not a cop.

Steph: Oh, Cosgrove, don't worry about it!

FKOD: Yeah, you know, Wheatley didn't act a lot like Wheatley from Portal 2. He wasn't dumb enough, you see.

Cosgrove: But... I want to be like Cosgrove, because he's cool.

FKOD: Maybe instead of mimicking your hero to be cool, you should tap into your inner cool.

Cosgrove: My inner cool?

Kelle: Come on FKOD, since when was being cool about accepting who you are and holding your head up high in the face of conflict? Being cool isn't a personal thing, it's about being what everyone else wants to be but can't be.

FKOD: Have you been hanging around with Epere again?

Kelle: Maybe.

Cosgrove: Well, cut that out.

Kelle: Okay.

Cosgrove: Wait... It worked that time. Hey, Steph, want to go eat frozen yogurts in the park?

Steph: Do I?

*They leave*

FKOD: Hm, I wonder if any of the readers even know who Cosgrove is.

Kelle: He's the Wooltchi. Duh.

FKOD: No, I meant the Cosgrove from Freakazoid. You know what? Naming my tamas after characters I like is confusing, I should stop it.

Kelle: You should.

FKOD: And you know what else I should stop? Forgetting the fun fact you guys. I'm so sorry.

Kelle: You should be.

FKOD: Ahem. Did you know: you magnetize certain kinds of metal, like iron, by stroking them with a magnet.

Kelle: You sh-- Oh, wait, nevermind.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Kelle

Gender: F

Character type: Horoyotchi

Age: 5 years

Gen: 46

Job: Bus Driver

Status: Apparently not sticking around for the update today

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Steph

Gender: F

Character type: Tsukkomitchi

Age: 7 years

Gen: 3

Job: Hair Stylist

Status: Feeling mildly accomplished (also now a mom!)

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Cosgrove

Gender: M

Character type: Wooltchi

Age: 5 years

Gen: 17

Friendship: 5/6

Status: Can't find a lot of crime

Ramada: *singing* His brain is overloaded, it has a chocolate coating... Uh, what was the next line?

FKOD: Textbook case for Sigmund Freud, Freakazoid, Freakazoid. Also you got that song stuck in my head now.

Ramada: Sorry. It's stuck in my head, too. Also, have you noticed any dimensional abnormalities lately?

FKOD: Hm? Well, I guess a few days ago Dr. Blobagus might have punched a hole in reality to ask me a pointless question, but other than that, nope.

Ramada: Okay. I guess that'd be the cause. @#$& that Blobagus.

FKOD: Hey, no swearing on the log!

Ramada: Oh, sorry, I didn't realize you were doing that right now.

FKOD: It's alright. Dr. Blobagus makes me want to curse like a sailor too.

Ramada: Ya think I was cursing like a sailor? Hehe, I could do better than that.

FKOD: NO DON'T. THE LOG IS RATED PG BY THE... Uh.... by me.

Ramada: Don't you worry, I'll wait 'till your done with your log thingy.

FKOD: 'Kay. So, what's been going on here lately?

Ramada: Well, a few eldritch monstrosities have been slipping into the house.

FKOD: Oh. That's not good.

Ramada: Yeah. Fortunately there haven't been any big ones, though.

*Cosgrove and Steph walk in*

Cosgrove: We're back.

FKOD: Gosh, you guys were gone for so long that I thought I'd have to put up little posters and stuff. Why were you gone so long?

Steph: Well, after we finished our yogurts, we decided to try out some crime fighting.

Cosgrove: All we found was a jaywalker, though.

Steph: We straightened him out pretty well, didn't we?

Cosgrove: I think he'll never cross a street without a crosswalk again.

Steph: Yup. I think we made a difference in this world.

FKOD: Let's celebrate with a fun fact! Did you know: 1 in 30 people in the U.S. are either in jail, on probation, or on parole?

Steph: Well jee, if criminals are that common why didn't Cosgrove and I find a bunch of criminals?

Ramada: Well, where did you guys look?

Cosgrove: Under rocks.

Steph: In hollow trees.

Cosgrove: Poked around in Wal-Mart.

Steph: Checked the clouds.

Ramada: Well, I'm pretty sure Wal-Mart is a festering hive of scum and villainy but what about those other places?

FKOD: Well, bugs and squirrels are like nature's criminals. And don't get me started on sky crime...

Ramada: ...Okay.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Kelle

Gender: F

Character type: Horoyotchi

Age: 6 years

Gen: 46

Job: Bus Driver

Status:

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Steph

Gender: F

Character type: Tsukkomitchi

Age: 8 years

Gen: 3

Job: Hair Stylist

Status:

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Cosgrove

Gender: M

Character type: Wooltchi

Age: 6 years

Gen: 17

Friendship: 6/6

Status: Married!

FKOD: Captain's Tamalog, stardate 712011...

Kinene: What?

FKOD: I've been wanting to start an update like that for a while now but I kept forgetting.

Kinene: Okay?

FKOD: It's a Star Trek reference.

Kinene: Is that the um... that one movie with the jedi people?

FKOD: No that's Star Wars.

Kinene: Okay. It's just so confusing, what with them having "star" in the name. Anyways, why are you down here on this computer instead of your laptop?

FKOD: Oh, I was doing my design for this T-shirt contest and I needed Photoshop. Uh... I don't think Precious will be jealous, will she?

Kelle: FKOD, computers can't feel jealousy.

FKOD: Shut up Kelle, Precious isn't like other computers! She has stickers.

Kinene: And that makes all the difference.

FKOD: INDEED. Now for a fun fact. Did you know: the first computer programmer in the world was a woman named Ada Lovelace.

Dr. Blobagus: Ada Lovelace?

FKOD: Yup.

Dr. Blobagus: ADA LOVELACE?!

FKOD: Er... Yeah.

Dr. Blobagus: ...Never heard of her. Lovely weather today, isn't it? I think I need a hat. *leaves*

Steph: Everything he says makes me feel confused and disoriented.

Cosgrove: The trick is to plug your ears when he's around.

Epere: *comes in* Okay, why is Dr. Blobagus flying through the kitchen shouting something about someone named Ada Lovelace?

FKOD: It's Kinene's fault.

Kinene: Actually it's Gaia's fault.

FKOD: No I'm pretty sure it is your fault Kinene.

Kinene: No, it's not. You were the one who mentioned Ada Lovelace in the first place.

FKOD: Stop using logic.

Epere: FKOD what did you do?

FKOD: The daily fun fact. I don't know why it set off Blobagus, it just did.

Steph: No one knows how his brain works.

FKOD: Well I'm sure he'll crash into a wall and forget all about it. So, anyways, the Fourth of July is coming up.

Kinene: That's your nation's independence day, correct?

FKOD: Yup! We celebrate with explosions and meat! Omnomnom boom!

Cosgrove: Sounds like my kind of holiday.

Dr. Blobagus: *comes back in* FKOD, have you seen my coat?

FKOD: Yes, it was stolen by a man who fled to Antarctica.

Dr. Blobagus: Ah. Well, I shall pursue him! *leaves*

FKOD: I told you he would forget about it.

Steph: Oh, now those poor little penguins will have to put up with him.

FKOD: Oh well, they'll survive. Anyways, I had a weird dream last night.

Epere: No one cares.

FKOD: You were in it, Epere.

Epere: I don't care.

FKOD: You died.

Epere: I don't care.

FKOD: But then this guy showed up and kissed your corpse and later your dreamself showed up and took your place.

Epere: I don't... wait, what?

FKOD: You know, like in Homestuck. After we broke this floor made of glass with some Cheerios you showed up dressed like a Derse dreamer. Also you weren't such a jerk in that dream.

Kelle: What about Cheerios?

FKOD: I don't even know. One of the people with me just pulled out a box of Cheerios and suggested that if we dropped some on the glass it would break. And it worked. It was really weird. And now it is dinner time! Toodles, readers!

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Kelle

Gender: F

Character type: Horoyotchi

Age: 7 years

Gen: 46

Job: Bus Driver

Status: Has a kid now

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Jazz

Gender: F

Character type: Hitodetchi

Age: 0 years

Gen: 4

Job: Preschooler

Status: Wants to do a song and dance number

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Cosgrove

Gender: M

Character type: Wooltchi

Age: 7 years

Gen: 17

Friendship: 5/6

Status: Is amazed by the sizelyness of this update

Jazz: I thought boys could only marry girls. At least that's what my teacher told me.

Airon: Well, some governments place restrictions on that sort of thing, yes, but when it comes to love things like gender don't matter.

Ryyx: The problem is there's some shallow jerks *coughdadcough* that don't seem to get that.

Airon: I think we're making progress, though, right?

Ryyx: I don't think so. Dad is as stubborn as a mule, and Mom just goes along with everything he says. As always.

Jazz: Maybe you should convince him that Airon is right for you with a song and dance number!

Ryyx: No one does those in real life.

FKOD: Even though it'd be awesome if they did.

Ryyx: Well, Dad hates musicals.

Jazz: That monster!

FKOD: Hey, didn't you tell me at one point that Aparus was a friend of your father's? Wouldn't the fact that Airon is his nephew have some effect on his opinion about this whole dealie?

Ryyx: Well, color me impressed, FKOD, you actually remembered something I told you from a previous conversation!

FKOD: Do I get a prize?

Ryyx: No. Anyways, to answer your other question, it doesn't give us much leverage, really. I imagine that Aparus himself could talk some sense into him... but I can't get a hold of him. I have no idea where he went off to.

Jazz: Let's search for him!

Airon: Where would we start?

Jazz: Well, your his nephew, you should know. Where does he live?

Airon: We already checked his house several times. He's not there.

Jazz: Well, what's the point of having a house if he doesn't live in it?

Airon: He really like traveling.

Cosgrove: So does FKOD's grandpa, but he's home sometimes.

Airon: He really likes traveling.

Cosgrove: Has he ever told you where he's going?

Airon: No.

???: I can tell you where he is.

Ryyx: Who are you?

FKOD: Why do these people just randomly show up at my house, anyways? I don't get it.

Prince of Hearts: I'm the Prince of Hearts.

Ryyx: Hm... have I heard that before?

POH: I believe you've met my pupil.

FKOD: Oh, you're that one guy.

POH: Indeed.

Airon: You know my uncle?

POH: I know many people.

Jazz: Are you popular?

POH: I suppose you could say that.

Kelle: I've never heard of you.

POH: Nor have I heard of you.

Mr. Margleton: Hey guys, I felt a strong demonic presence up here. Is everything okay? Hey, who are you?

POH: My name is the Prince of Hearts. And you?

Mr. Margleton: I'm Mr. Margleton, resident angel.

POH: It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Margleton.

Mr. Margleton: *nods* Just so you know, I'll have to watch you. It's my duty as an angel to monitor the activities of a powerful demon such as yourself.

POH: Very well, I understand.

Jazz: I thought that demons and angels didn't get along.

Mr. Margleton: Well, we don't, but we have to respect each other. If we were fighting constantly, the universe would eventually be torn apart. Neither side wants that.

Cosgrove: I know I don't.

Ryyx: We're getting off subject. Where's Aparus?

POH: He's been imprisoned.

Airon: What?! By who?

POH: Me.

Airon: Y-you?!

Mr. Margleton: Er, holding a mortal hostage counts as a reportable offense.

POH: Oh, but this little mortal tried to kill me. But I can't kill anyone anymore, so I just locked him away.

Cosgrove: Couldn't you have just told him to stop?

Ryyx: And what was that about not being able to kill anymore?

POH: Do you want to know why I'm called the Prince of Hearts? Well, you see, I eat hearts. But after taking so many lives, the archangel Miloniel stepped in and cursed me so that I may never take a life again, directly or indirectly. This curse could only be broken by consuming the heart of an immortal... so I sent my servant to collect one.

FKOD: Something about that sounds familiar...

POH: If you were thinking of Rhian's heart, then yes, you've seen my servant.

FKOD: The little grim reaper dude! Hey, he got her heart, why didn't your curse get broken?

POH: Because Aparus killed my servant. So I watched him. And then I plotted my revenge. I convinced the scientist and his immortal ally to betray you and absorb the powers of Esthis.

FKOD: Why didn't you just imprison him in the first place?

POH: Because you lost your greatest allies at that point, correct?

FKOD: Oh. Okay. But why does it matter what sort of allies we have?

POH: Because it is prophesied that Ryyx and Aparus will lead a small army to destroy me.

Mr. Margleton: Just so you know, a lot of this stuff you're doing is really evil so I'm going to have to--

POH: *grabs Margleton* Silence.

Mr. Margleton: Mrph!

POH: *tosses Margleton to the side*

FKOD: Woah, dude, not cool. No one treats Mr. Margleton like that!

POH: And what will you do about it?

FKOD: Well, you see... Battydoken! *Hadoukens Ninja Batty Shogun Ugly Doll at POH*

POH: Ah. Of course.

FKOD: I've got more where that came from! Go, Somy!

Somy: ?

FKOD: Somy, use Psychic!

Somy: *gives FKOD a look*

FKOD: What are you waiting for? He's a bad guy.

Mr. Margleton: He probably senses his power...

POH: I have no time for this. I may not be able to end your life, Ryyx, but I can imprison you.

Airon: No!

POH: And what will you do to stop me? I do recall you being unarmed as of late.

Airon: *pulls out fancy new guns* Not quite. Now leave Ryyx alone!

Ryyx: A-Airon!

POH: How cute. But the prophecy must hold true, so you can't kill me.

FKOD: Maybe we should beat him with a rolled up newspaper instead.

Airon: I don't care about the prophecy! I'll protect Ryyx even if it costs me my life.

Kelle: Haven't you been paying attention? He can't kill you either.

Airon: Oh, right. Well, still, you can't have Ryyx! *shoots at POH*

POH: *blocks with a magic shield* Oh, magic bullets. Quite a fine pair of firearms you have, but little can pierce through my defenses.

FKOD: Hey, Prince of Hearts, can we take a break from all this drama? I need to do the fun fact.

POH: Make it quick.

FKOD: Awesomesauce. Did you know: the tradition of wearing a wedding ring on the ring finger of the left hand dates back to Egyptian times, where it was thought that the vein of love ran from that finger directly to the heart.

POH: Are you done now?

FKOD: Wait. I think I know how to defeat you.

POH: Make it quick.

FKOD: Okay! I challenge you to a riddle contest!

POH: No.

FKOD: But--

POH: No.

FKOD: D:

Airon: *shoots POH in the head*

POH: Nice shot. Too bad headshots don't kill me. *punches Airon in the gut*

Ryyx: Airon! That's it, you're going down, you #$%@#%&!

FKOD: Hey, no swearing on the log! Also Ryyx he's going to kidnap you maybe you should have ran away while Airon was distracting him so his efforts wouldn't be in vain.

POH: *punches Ryyx in the face* Indeed.

Cosgrove: Hey. Cut that out.

POH: ...Why should I?

Cosgrove: Because I told you to. Anyways, you have Aparus locked up, why do you need to imprison Ryyx?

POH: Because he might mount a rescue mission.

Kelle: Hey, if you didn't come here, we wouldn't have even known about you actually being evil and stuff.

POH: I came because one of my minions decided to betray me. She's on her way here as we speak. Since I have no way of disposing of her, I intended to take Ryyx away before she can warn you.

????: *runs in* Guys! The Prince of Hearts is evil! He kidnapped some dude named Aparus!

FKOD: Yeah, we know.

????: Oh. Crap.

POH: Hello, Tari.

Tari: Oh. Nice to see you, Prince of Hearst. Kidnappin' more people? Who do you think you are, Candle-- wait, I shouldn't say that.

POH: I was about to leave. You should stay here, Tari, since you've obviously decided to side with these fools.

Tari: Hm. Hmmmmmmm. I might have to call the angel cops on you. Maybe they can't make you dead but they can keep you from kidnapping boys. Why do you need boys? Boys are silly. I mean really, just look at the new guy.

POH: I'm the only one who can restore your humanity, though. If I'm sealed away, there's no possible way for me to do that, is there?

Tari: ...Fine. I won't call the angel cops. Now restore my humanity. Being a demon stinks.

*some angel cops burst in*

Angel Cop 1: Hands in the air!

AC2: Drop your weapons!

AC3: Everyone freeze!

AC1: Oh man, that was cool, bursting in like human cops. Okay, in all seriousness... Miss Tari Diran?

Tari: 'Sup.

Kelle: I thought you said you weren't going to call them.

Tari: Yeah. Uh.... when did I call those guys... OH RIGHT, FIVE FREAKING MINUTES AGO. Rightio. Wait, why wasn't I going to call them?

Kelle: I never thought I'd see someone more forgetful than FKOD.

FKOD: Hey. >:|

AC2: Ah, the Prince of Hearst.

POH: Hearts.

AC3: We got the wrong guy?

AC2: Wait... there's no demon called the Prince of Hearst. But there is a Prince of Hearts.

AC1: So this is the kidnapper, hm?

AC2: Yes. It seems that this is one of those demons that trick people into thinking they've embraced a moralistically inclined way of life.

AC3: Tricky little monster.

Jazz: So are you taking the Prince of Hearts to angel jail?

AC1: No. We're going to have to write up a report and send it to our superiors and then this will get squared away in a couple of days.

Jazz: Why can't you just take him to angel jail?

AC2: Us? Oh, we can't do that. The Prince of Hearts is a class C-24 demon, and we're only class I-14 angels.

AC3: In other words, he's way stronger than we are.

POH: Hehehe...

Jazz: Why are you laughing?

POH: A few days is all I need.

AC1: For what?

POH: I'm not telling you.

AC1: Aw, come on.

POH: No.

AC1: :<

POH: *teleports away*

Cosgrove: He got away.

AC2: Don't worry. I already have all the data I need. Analyzing demons is my specialty. I just need to ask Miss Tari Diran some questions.

Tari: ...

AC2: Miss Diran, what is your boss--

Tari: HE DIDN'T TURN ME BACK. THAT LYING SON OF A HAMSTER WHEEL.

AC2: Uh, I understand you're under stress, but--

Tari: I'm going to kill that little brat, just you wait. Okay, what was that prophecy... had to be killed by an army led by... some guys... or something...

FKOD: Ryyx and Aparus.

Tari: YES. THANK YOU. I gotta find these guys!

FKOD: Well, Ryyx is laying unconscious on the floor, and Aparus is the dude that the Prince of Hearts kidnapped.

Tari: Ah. I knew I should have taken that guy with me. Oh well, I still have the keys to the cell with me. So, now I need an army. Okay, I'mma recruit you, that guy, those little critters, that blob with the dude in it, and that tentacle guy.

FKOD: Don't recruit the tentacle guy, he's terrible.

Dr. Blobagus: I don't want to join the boy scouts. I don't need badges.

Tari: But... you could contribute to your community! By killing a demon prince!

Dr. Blobagus: Not interested. I have to feed my new dog.

Jazz: New dog?

Dr. Blobagus: Yes. *puts bowl of food in front of dog plushie* He hasn't been eating lately.

Tari: You know what? I really like you, you should join my army. C'mon, everyone else is.

Jazz: Not really. You didn't even ask us if we were okay with that.

Tari: Well, you know what? You're a Christmas tree topper and I'm an oak tree, so don't tell me what to do.

Jazz: Uh, what?

Tari: I actually had no idea where that metaphor was going. Anyways, you're in my army whether you like it or not, so get used to it, Starfy.

Jazz: My name is Jazz.

Tari: Alright, Louis Armstrong. Let's bust out Aparsusus... whatever you call him.

Cosgrove: What's the plan?

Tari: We go in. We get him out. We come back and teach Ryyx and Aparus the way of the boyscouts-- I mean, generals. In armies.

FKOD: Can we do that tomorrow? A lot happened today and I'm tired.

Tari: Sleep is for the weak and lazy.

FKOD: I am weak and lazy.

Tari: Oh. Well, good night.

AC2: So, will you answer my questions now, Miss Diran?

Tari: Questions? Sure. Whatever. Hey, you, stop typing, you have to rest.

FKOD: 'Kay.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Cora

Gender: F

Character type: Kuchitamatchi

Age: 0 years

Gen: 47

Job: Preschooler

Status: Just a little shy

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Jazz

Gender: F

Character type: Urayoungmemetchi

Age: 2 years

Gen: 4

Job: Smiley Face Student

Status: Wants to help everyone to fight the bad guys

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Cosgrove

Gender: M

Character type: Wooltchi

Age: 9 years

Gen: 17

Friendship: 4.5/6

Status: Happy Fourth of July, kids

POH: I was lying about the prophecy, actually. Anyone could have struck me through the heart and ended my life.

Ryyx: But why did you make that up? Why do you need Aparus?

POH: Well, if you recall, Aparus lived his earlier days as a warmage. At one point, he was struck by a small shard from a magical weapon, and the medics decided it would be far too dangerous to remove it. So it's been in his body ever since, reacting with the magical energies within him. He's essentially a living magic battery at this point, which makes him an ideal source of power for the weapon Dorle built for me.

Ryyx: Weapon? What good is a weapon to you?

POH: This weapon does not kill. It doesn't even cause damage. All it does is make the target feel pain... horrendous, unbearable pain. Imagine, what if every living creature was to be subjected to this for the rest of their lives?

Mr. Margleton: But something on that scale would draw the archangels' attention for sure.

POH: Oh, that was my plan all along! You see, many other demons like myself are planning large-scale attacks!

Mr. Margleton: That's in violation of the contract! That would start another war!

POH: Yes. And that would, of course, lead to the destruction of the universe.

Ramada: Uh. Don't you kind of need a universe to hang around in?

POH: Oh, of course. But this isn't the only universe. You see, me and my colleagues, we've stumbled upon this universe where there are no angels, only demons. They've been working to destroy any universe that contains angels so that they may keep on ruling their own universe. And if we destroyed this one, they'd let us join them in their universe. Then we could do as we please without these foolish angels breathing down our necks!

Tari: So how about restoring my humanity?

POH: Did you listen to anything I just said? Me and the other demons lords are going to destroy this universe! I'm not taking you with me, so you're going to die!

FKOD: Well, to be fair, you've been lying about all sorts of things so far, so you could be lying about destroying the universe.

Jazz: Yeah, seriously. Plus, isn't it just you big demon guys going to the other universe? What about the other demons?

POH: There's plenty of demons in the other universe. I can get new minions.

Dorle: Er... You're not taking me with you?

Rhian: Or me?

POH: You two have served your purpose.

Dorle: What? But I helped you! Is it because I'm a human? Is it?

Epere: Dorle, if you haven't figured it out, this guy doesn't give a #$&@ about you.

FKOD: Hey, no swearing on the log!

Epere: Are you seriously doing your log right now? Put your freaking laptop away.

FKOD: Well, if all of creation is going to end, then my readers deserve to know.

Ramada: Creation is not going to end. We'll figure out some way to stop this guy.

Kinene: Ramada, I like your enthusiasm and perseverance, but we're trapped in a magic bubble created by a powerful demon which none of us seem to be able to escape.

Ramada: You think that's going to stop me from trying?

Epere: Ramada, shut up. We're doomed, get over it.

Ramada: Don't you even start with that #%#@!

Cosgrove: Hey. Cut that out.

Airon: Cosgrove is right. If we have any chance of surviving, any chance of making a difference, we have to work together to figure it out!

Epere: Oh come on, it's obvious that we're doo--

FKOD: Shut up Epere, no one cares about what you think. We're going to punch through this shield with the power of HOPE!

Rhian: *rolls eyes* FKOD, I have Esthis's powers, which makes me the best mage here, and I can't get through that thing.

FKOD: You just launched icicles at it, that doesn't count. Your pulling us down, too. How the heck are we going to hope our way out of here with a bunch of you pessimists around?

Mr. Margleton: Hope is good, but what about the power of love?

Jazz: So... we should all start making out? I don't see where that will get us.

Tari: Well, if we're all going to die, then hey, no consequences.

Mr. Margleton: No! That's not what I meant at all!

FKOD: Oh right, love lasers! But how many of us can muster up enough love to do that?

Kinene: That could be an issue. Some of us don't get along. *glances at Epere and Ramada*

Ramada: I can get along with Epere when he's not spouting crap about us being doomed. I mean seriously, we've been doomed several times, and we found a way out of it.

POH: Ah, here it is. The key to my success.

Dez: Need anything elsse, ssir?

POH: No, that's fine.

Efisngenana: Dez, stop serving that guy!

Dez: Sssssss, you're not my boss. Why don't you rehire that depressssed heap of uselessssnessss next to you if you're so dessperate for minionss?

Etrius: ...I still can't believe it...

Efisngenana: Etrius, stop moping and help us escape.

Etrius: ...

FKOD: Maybe we should shout positive things at each other! Or something. I'm running out of ideas.

POH: Dez, activate the machine.

Dez: It'ss powering up.

Kinene: Dorle, how does that machine work?

Dorle: After it starts up, the machine emits a field that interferes with the nervous systems of those around it. The field will eventually envelop the entire planet, and everyone but me, Rhian, and the Prince of Hearts will be under it's influence.

Dez: I didn't hear my name in that lisst.

Dorle: I was never told to program an exception for you.

Dez: *glares at the Prince of Hearts* Why iss that?

POH: *grabs Dez and tosses him into the bubble* Because I have no further use for you.

Dez: W-what? But...

Efisngenana: I told you.

Dez: Sssss, sshut up.

Rhian: Hm, so anything can enter the shield, but nothing can escape...

Ryyx: I know! Let's turn it inside-out!

POH: Don't be stupid, only I can do that.

Ryyx: But there's this theory about people who can turn others' magic against them by interacting with the physical manifestations of their magic as they would any other magical artifact.

Epere: But no one has proved that.

Ryyx: Well maybe I will. With this shield bubble.

POH: Why should you bother? It's hopeless.

Ryyx: You know what? I bet that you're just saying that because you know I can do this. *puts hand on the shield*

POH: Am not.

Ryyx: Yes you are. *pushes hand through shield*

FKOD: *dramatic gasp* He's so stupid that he can make people's magic stop working!

Ryyx: I'm not stupid!

FKOD: Okay then, you're just so full of yourself that you can make people's magic stop working!

Ryyx: The shield didn't stop working, I just turned it inside out. We can escape now!

POH: Hmph! That doesn't change anything! Soon the machine will activate and you'll be helpless!

Rhian: I won't.

POH: You may be a strong mage, but you're merely a human. I will take you apart before you can even touch me.

FKOD: Pst hey Dorle.

Dorle: What.

FKOD: What's that machine's weakness?

Dorle: An electric shock could neutralize it, but that could kill Aparus.

FKOD: Well, I have a plan. You see, Pokemon moves aren't ever very lethal, so if I teach one of them an electric type move... Go, Lightning!

Lighting: Barf.

FKOD: Okay, let's see, got this TM.... There we go.

POH: What are you planning?

FKOD: Lightning, live up to your name and use Thunderbolt!

Lightning: *uses Thunderbolt*

POH: *draws in bolt with his wings* I can't let you do that.

FKOD: Who do you think you are, that wolf dude from the Starfox games?

POH: What?

Ryyx: Everyone, get him!

*insert intense fight scene here*

FKOD: Okay, Lightning, let's try this agai-- AGH, JEEGUS, THE MACHINE...

Dorle: Quickly, Lightning! Before it's too late!

Lightning: *uses Thunderbolt again, and this time it works*

POH: What? No!

Ryyx: *stabs POH in the heart* It's over now.

POH: N-no... *slumps down* I failed... but my colleagues will succeed... don't think you've won! *fades away*

Ryyx: ...

Tari: Dude, you just killed a demon prince and you didn't even do a snappy one-liner? What kind of hero are you?

Ryyx: Hey! Wait, hero?

FKOD: Hey, I'm the one who deactivated the machine!

Lightning: *stares at FKOD*

FKOD: Okay, actually it was Lightning. Which makes him the hero.

Airon: But... Aparus was in there...

FKOD: Don't worry, Pokemon moves aren't really ever lethal. Once there was this Team Rocket dude who got hyper beamed and he was okay afterward.

Kinene: Well, let's get him out of there!

Dorle: Ah, yes. Let me, I know the proper procedure. *then he does that*

Cora: ...That was scary, wasn't it?

Jazz: Well, we saved the day! So there's that.

Cosgrove: Happy Fourth of July, kids.

Tari: But the universe is still in peril.

Cosgrove: Happy Fourth of July, kids.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Cora

Gender: F

Character type: Urayoungmemetchi

Age: 1 year

Gen: 47

Job: Fisticuffs student

Status: You have to turn it flip-ways

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Jazz

Gender: F

Character type: Purimatchi

Age: 3 years

Gen: 4

Job: Smiley Face Student

Status: Let's just chill

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Aarron

Gender: M

Character type: Mattaritchi

Age: 0 years

Gen: 18

Friendship: 2/6

Status: What are you talking about that was hilarious

Mr. Margleton: Hey, Ryyx, I got a message from my boss for you.

Ryyx: Oh, really?

Mr. Margleton: Yeah, she's going to be speaking through me in a minute. If she says anything that offends you, er, please don't hurt me.

Ryyx: Uh... Okay?

Mr. Margleton: Okay, here goes... Good evening, Ryyx. I'd like to congratulate you on your success in preventing the Prince of Hearts from carrying out his plans.

Ryyx: Why thank you.

FKOD: Hey, Lightning helped.

Mr. Margleton: Yes, Gaia, I am aware of that.

Ryyx: Well, uh, so is the universe safe?

Mr. Margleton: The universe was never truly in danger. Some worlds, perhaps, but not the universe.

Ryyx: Oh.

Mr. Margleton: We have no intention of starting a war with the demons, regardless of whether or not they break the contract.

Jazz: So, we can just sort of chill out now, right? We don't have to worry.

Mr. Margleton: Yes. If you aren't concerned about the fate of the other worlds targeted by the Prince's colleagues, that is.

Jazz: :[

Ryyx: Er... is there anything we could do about that?

Mr. Margleton: If the angels take action, it could result in a war. Dealing with the demons is a very delicate matter. Besides, most of the other demons are far more dangerous than the Prince of Hearts, considering that they aren't cursed like he was.

Epere: Can't you curse the other guys to level the playing field?

Mr. Margleton: No. When the Prince of Hearts was cursed, he realized that he had come dangerously close to breaking the contract, so he backed off. But this time we are dealing with demons that are trying to start something with us, and making any sort of antagonistic move would be interpreted as a call to war.

Tari: The moral of the story? Demons are poo and I don't want to be one anymore. Hey, you can turn me back, right? *waggles eyebrows*

Mr. Margleton: Perhaps. But ever since you became a demon, you've used your new form as an excuse to do as you please.

Tari: Demon-me made me take that teddy bear from the kid! I wouldn't do that as a human, I swear!

Mr. Margleton: If you prove to me that you can overcome your demonic nature, I will grant your request.

Tari: But you're an angel! You're supposed to help people!

Mr. Margleton: You're in no danger.

Tari: But... *grabs Airon's arm and moves his hand to her head* He's got me at gun-point!

Airon: I'm not holding a gun.

Tari: *takes one of Airon's guns and sticks it in his hand* He's gonna shoot me if you don't turn me back!

Cora: Um... you put it in his hand the wrong way... he's not holding the handle part...

Tari: *flips gun around* Oh, please benevolent angel person, help me!

Mr. Margleton: No. I care not for your antics.

Aarron: I thought it was funny.

Tari: Your face is funny, punk.

Aarron: OH NO YOU DIDN'T.

Mr. Margleton: Ahem.

Aarron: Sorry benevolent angel who is Mr. Margleton's boss... Do you have a name?

Mr. Margleton: Hm... I've been think about getting one...

Jazz: Why don't you have one?

Mr. Margleton: I came into being long before the concept of names even existed. I thought about giving myself a name when mortals invented that concept... but I haven't thought of one to my liking.

FKOD: We should exchange a procrastinator's fist bump... later.

Mr. Margleton: Huh? What? Oh, hey I'm back. Oh gosh I don't remember what she said I was basically unconscious don't hurt me.

Jazz: Woah, chiil. Why are you spazzing all of a sudden.

Mr. Margleton: Sorry. Last time my boss did that the dude she was talking to was very, very unhappy. It was a bit of a traumatic experience for me.

FKOD: Will sleepy time make Margleton feel better?

Mr. Margleton: Yeah, channeling a god is pretty tiring.

FKOD: Oh poo I haven't done a fun fact NEVERMIND IT'S ONE IN THE MORNING APPARENTLY HOLY CRAP. What Mr. Margleton said can be the fun fact good night.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Cora

Gender: F

Character type: Uravioletchi

Age: 3 years

Gen: 47

Job: Fisticuffs student

Status: Epere if you hurt Cora's feelings I will cut you

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Jazz

Gender: F

Character type: Purimatchi

Age: 5 years

Gen: 4

Job: Balloon catcher

Status: SHOCKING REVELATIONS

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Aarron

Gender: M

Character type: Necktietchi

Age: 2 years

Gen: 18

Friendship: 4/6

Status: FKOD update darn it

Aarron: You didn't update yesterday! How dare you!

FKOD: :|

Aarron: Don't make that face at me young lady.

??????: *walks in* Oh little brother, where are you?~

Epere: Narena, what the crap are you doing here?

Narena: Hm? You didn't get my letter a few days ago?

Epere: Letter?

Narena: The one saying I was going to visit my favorite little brother for a week.~

Epere: I'm your only little brother.

Narena: And your also my favorite!~ So, where's your girlfriend?

Epere: I don't have one.

Narena: What about that girl at the computer?

FKOD and Epere: NO.

Narena: Oh. Well, that little tentacle guy told me that you had a girlfriend.

Epere: What? How the $% did you even meet Blobagus?

FKOD: WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT SWEARING?

Narena: Oh, he's a potty-mouth, isn't he? Don't worry, he just puts on that tough guy attitude to hide his insecurities. Anyways, I was summoning eldritch abominations one day and I got him.

Epere: Didn't I tell you not to do that?

Narena: I'm the older sibling, bub. You can't tell me what to do with my wizard powers.

Epere: I meant tell people that I'm insecure.

Narena: Well I can't lie.

Epere: Yes you can.

Narena: But you are insecure.

Epere: Am not.

*Ramada and Kinene walk in*

Ramada: Hey, who're you?

Narena: Oh, I bet one of those ladies would be your girlfriend, right?

Epere: No!

Narena: Oh, little brother, no need to be so shy about it! I won't judge you about who your girlfriend is, just tell me!

Epere: I don't have a girlfriend!

Ramada: He's telling the truth. He's too much of a jerk to successfully woo any ladies.

Narena: Oh, he's had a girlfriend before! It's not impossible!

Epere: I told you, we were just friends!

Jazz: You were actually friends with someone?

Aarron: Wow, I didn't think he could ever be friendly with someone.

Narena: No, she actually was his girlfriend! She even told me she liked him!

Kinene: I assume they must have broken up though, correct?

Epere: Shut up, that isn't your business!

Narena: Now now, Epere. No need to be so insecure about it! It's perfectly normal for a romantic relationship to fail.

Epere: I'm not being insecure, I just want these idiots to stay out of my business!

Cora: ...Idiots?

Jazz: We're not idiots!

Ramada: Yeah, we're just nosy.

Kinene: Why not tell us about her?

Epere: It's not important, so shut--

Narena: You see, they were childhood friends, so naturally they were very close!

Epere: Narena, shut your mou--

Narena: And when they were in high school, love blossomed.<3

Epere: We were never in love!

Narena: Yes you were, I saw that look in your eyes.~ You were always so much cheerful around that time... but then things fell apart somehow.

Epere: She wasn't my girlfriend, she was just my friend, we were teenagers and something stupid happened, okay?

Kinene: Oh, poor Epere.

Ramada: Kinene, stop pitying him, he doesn't really deserve it.

Kinene: But maybe his behavior has something to do with his broken heart?

Narena: Nah, he was always like that. He was just less so when he was in love.

Epere: Shut up!

Dr. Blobagus: I have different theory about his behavior. It seems that Narena enjoys picking on Epere. So therefore, he developed his attitude in order to be more appealing to swans.

Narena: I'm not sure whether your blaming me or swans for his behavior.

Dr. Blobagus: Both. If he has a personality that appeals to swans, then you'll stop picking on him.

Narena: Oh please, Doctor, I pick on all my little siblings. It's my duty as the oldest sister.

Epere: No it's not.

Narena: Yes it is. Just ask anyone who has younger siblings!

Ramada: I used to pick on my little sister all the time. I grew out of it, though.

Narena: You're only kind of helping me out here.

Ramada: Sorry. I can't lie.

Epere: *smiles a little*

Narena: Ooooooooh, I see.~

Epere: See what?

Narena: Oh, nothing. I think I'm going to unpack and settle in!~

FKOD: I know what will help you settle in! A fun fact! Did you know: two-thirds of people say that they fall in love with someone they've known for a while instead of someone they just met.

Narena: That's nice, but how is that going to help me settle in?

FKOD: Idunno.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Cora

Gender: F

Character type: Uravioletchi

Age: 4 years

Gen: 47

Job: Teacher

Status: Um... uh...

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Jazz

Gender: F

Character type: Purimatchi

Age: 6 years

Gen: 4

Job: Balloon catcher

Status: Has an adorable little daughter now

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Aarron

Gender: M

Character type: Necktietchi

Age: 3 years

Gen: 18

Friendship: 6/6

Status: All babies are the same

Narena: She's so cute!~ Well, the rest of you are cute too, but she's just so tiny! Can I hold her?

Jazz: Sure!

Narena: Daaaaaaaaw, she's so cute!

Aarron: You've never seen a tama baby, have you? 'Cause they all pretty much look the same... well, in my family they look like little mushrooms, but still.

Narena: Oh, but look at her! She's wiggling around!

Jazz: She wants to be put down.

Narena: Okay! *puts kid down* I wish I had my own child.

Epere: No you don't.

Narena: Yes I do.

Epere: Look. First you have an eating, pooping, crying little monster. Then they learn to walk and nothing you own is safe anymore. They learn to talk, and they don't learn to shut up.

Narena: You must be an expert on this, Epere, considering how many children you have!

Epere: I don't have children, but we have younger sisters, you know. Oh wait, you were off doing crap while our parents made me babysit them.

Narena: But Epere, they behaved more for you than for me!

Epere: That's because they were afraid of me. Unlike you, I know about something called discipline.

Narena: Oh, you would make such a good daddy!

FKOD: If I had Epere for a dad, I would have probably developed some psychological issues.

Epere: Narena, is there any filter between your brain and your mouth? Any at all?

Narena: No, I'm serious! If you had kids, they would be very well-behaved, I imagine.

Epere: I'd rather die a slow, horrible death than have children.

FKOD: Well I'd rather do today's fun fact than have children! Did you know: the average toddler takes 176 steps per minute. Anyways, it's lunch time! :3

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Cora

Gender: F

Character type: Uravioletchi

Age: 6 years

Gen: 47

Job: Teacher

Status: Sadface :<

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Alva

Gender: F

Character type: Kuchitamatchi

Age: 0 years

Gen: 4

Job: Preschooler

Status: Spin spin spin

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Aarron

Gender: M

Character type: Necktietchi

Age: 5 years

Gen: 18

Friendship: 6/6

Status: Don't get him mixed up with that other guy who's name starts with an A- and ends with a -ron.

Aarron: Cora, you okay?

Cora: *sniffle* No.

Aarron: What's wrong?

Cora: *sniff* Tari... she got mad at something... and when I tried to make her feel better she yelled at me. ;-;

Alva: Would it make you better if you played the spinny game with me?

Aarron: The spinny game?

Alva: It's a game where you and some other people spin together and the last one standing wins.

Dr. Blobagus: *is spinning* Alva, just so you know, you just lost.

Alva: But I can't spin and talk to someone at the same time.

Dr. Blobagus: Yes you can.

Alva: Well, we're going to start a new game, so stop spinning.

Dr. Blobagus: But I'm working on breaking the world record.

FKOD: Time for a mildly relevant fun fact! Did you know: on November 18, 2006, Ashrita Furman made a spinning top spin for seven hours, one minute, and fourteen seconds? That is the longest recorded time that a spinning top spun.

Dr. Blobagus: Get me a spinning top. I will break that record.

FKOD: I don't have a spinning top.

Dr. Blobagus: Then buy one for me.

FKOD: Why don't you buy one for yourself?

Aarron: Because he's spinning.

Dr. Blobagus: Yes, thank you Airon.

Aarron: It's Aarron, not Airon.

Dr. Blobagus: Oh. I was wondering how you got so short and balded. Also you changed your name?

Alva: No, silly! He's Aarron, and Airon is still his four-foot-something curly haired self!

Dr. Blobagus: Oh. Well, it's hard to tell, because I think I'm getting dizzy.

Cora: Um... don't overdo it, Mr. Blobagus.

Dr. Blobagus: Rest assured, Cory, I am perfectly fine.

Cora: It's Cora.

Dr. Blobagus: I knew that. It was just the slip of the tongue.

FKOD: Well, we're going to have lunch and give Tari a very stern talking-to, so, see ya later. Tell us if you break that record.

Dr. Blobagus: Okay.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Cora

Gender: F

Character type: Uravioletchi

Age: 7 years

Gen: 47

Job: Teacher

Status: Is a mommy now

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Alva

Gender: F

Character type: Urayoungmemetchi

Age: 1 year

Gen: 4

Job: Sparkliness student

Status: SMILE DARN IT

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Aarron

Gender: M

Character type: Necktietchi

Age: 6 years

Gen: 18

Friendship: 5/6

Status: Married

Dorle: *points a laser at FKOD* Hello, Gaia?

FKOD: What are you doing?

Dorle: Well... I was bored, so I decided to antagonize you. You know, like the old days.

FKOD: Well, stop it. I don't feel like being antagonized.

Dorle: ...Not even a little bit?

FKOD: No.

Dorle: Not even a teeny bit?

FKOD: Nope.

Dorle: Can I antagonize your tamagotchis?

Alva: Maybe if you ask nicely, you can chase me around a bit. But just make it pretend, though, 'cause I don't like being shot.

Dorle: But it's no fun that way.

Aarron: Well, tough.

Dorle: :[

Cora: Um... maybe you could read a book or something?

Dorle: Hm. I've already read all my books and some books I stole from FKOD's house...

FKOD: :0

Alva: Well, if you don't want to read, why don't you draw a picture with lots of smiley faces on it?

Dorle: Okay.

FKOD: And to make us all have smiley faces, here's the fun fact! Did you know: newborn babies prefer people who smile over those who don't. :]

Cora's daughter: :]

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Cora

Gender: F

Character type: Uravioletchi

Age: 8 years

Gen: 47

Job: Teacher

Status: Doesn't see those spaceships

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Alva

Gender: F

Character type: Urayoungmemetchi

Age: 2 years

Gen: 4

Job: Sparkliness student

Status: Wants a unicorn

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Aarron

Gender: M

Character type: Necktietchi

Age: 7 years

Gen: 18

Friendship: 5/6

Status: Stop that, you guys

FKOD: It's quick update time because I'm lazy!

Alva: But I don't like quick update time. I want a long update filled with twists and turns and unicorns.

FKOD: Look, do I have to tell you this again? I'm not catching any unicorns for you. They are hard to find!

Alva: No they aren't.

FKOD: Yes they are! They're not even native to this area. And I'm an amateur monsterologist, so I would know.

Airon: I thought the term for someone who studies magical creatures was a cryptozoologist.

FKOD: Oh aren't we fancy? Airon, why don't you just put on a top hat and monocle so you can show us how fancy you are?

Airon: Well, why don't you stop being so rude?

FKOD: Sorry. I've been working on some projects and stuff and I guess I'm a bit burnt out.

Kinene: Are you sure it's just because Ryyx isn't here right now to reprimand you for your behavior?

FKOD: Oh, Kinene, you and and your logic.

Aarron: Why don't we stop picking at each other and do a fun fact?

FKOD: Capital idea, old chap! Did you know: a group of unicorns is called a blessing.

Cora: And a group of crows is called a murder.

FKOD: And a group of dolphins or a group of kids and a chaperone from my school on a field trip is called a pod!

Dr. Blobagus: And a group of space ships is called a fleet. Like that one up there!

*everyone looks out the window*

Cora: Um... I don't see anything.

Kinene: Me neither.

Dr. Blobagus: That's because you don't have doctor eyes like I do.

FKOD: Yeah, we're just not qualified to have vivid hallucinations like you do.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Quill

Gender: F

Character type: Hitodetchi

Age: 0 years

Gen: 48

Job: Preschooler

Status: Wants an attack dog

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Alva

Gender: F

Character type: Uramemetchi

Age: 3 years

Gen: 4

Job: Sparkliness student

Status: Hopes those Jehovah's Witnesses are okay

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Aarron

Gender: M

Character type: Necktietchi

Age: 8 years

Gen: 18

Friendship: 5/6

Status: Has a daughter now

FKOD: So apparently some Jehovah's Witnesses came here while we were shopping.

Kinene: Some whats?

FKOD: They're these religious people who visit houses and preach. And these guys must be pretty darn devoted to come out here to the middle of nowhere and brave the bears and dogs and stuff.

Ryyx: I haven't seen a single bear since I've been here, FKOD.

FKOD: But there's still dogs.

Ramada: Like those two tiny fluffy ones and the one that likes to flop down on the ground and wag her tail when you approach her?

FKOD: Actually, I was thinking about the ones that were trained to attack or something that are owned by the lady down the other road.

Alva: Uh oh, I hope those people didn't go down that road.

Quill: Can I have a dog that bites people?

FKOD: No.

Quill: Darn. Can I have a cat that bites people?

FKOD: Sometimes if you try to tickle Qetesh on the chin she'll nip at you. Does that count?

Quill: No.

FKOD: Well, too bad.

Quill: Darn. Can I--

FKOD: Anyways, before Quill asks about getting anymore vicious animals, let's admire my new lamp that I got.

Aarron: It is pretty admirable, isn't it?

FKOD: Indeed. It's like five times brighter than the lamp I had before. And it's colorful and pretty. And stuff.

Efisngenana: If your so in love with it, why don't you marry it?

FKOD: I wouldn't want to make Precious jealous, would I?

Efisngenana: ...

Alva: She's referring to her laptop.

Efisngenana: Unfortunately, I was aware of that. Anyways, I'm trying to whip my minions back into shape and it's not working.

Epere: No one cares.

Efisngenana: You aren't qualified to make that judgment.

Narena: But he's right.~

Efisngenana: No he's not.

Ramada: Yeah, he is.

Quill: I couldn't give a rat's butt about what you're doing.

FKOD: Maybe we would listen if it had something to do with space cowboys.

Efisngenana: How is that relevant to anything?

FKOD: They aren't. They're just awesome and I want to talk about them instead of your personal issues.

Narena: Ooh, what about space wizards?

Dr. Blobagus: Everyone knows those are beings of superstition.

Narena: No they aren't. I've met a space wizard.

Epere: No you haven't.

Narena: And how would you know that?

Epere: You're a habitual liar.

Narena: Oh really?

Epere: Yes, really.

Narena: Then how do you explain this scar on my knee?

Epere: You fell, obviously.

Narena: But it's a magical scar.

Epere: Is not.

Narena: And how do you know that?

Ryyx: It looks like a magical scar to me.

Epere: Well, space wizards aren't the only magic users around.

Efisngenana: Can we just shut up about the space wizards?

Narena: No.

FKOD: Well, can I do the fun fact?

Narena: Go for it.

FKOD: Did you know: people in ancient China would stay warm by keeping little dogs in their sleeves.

Quill: Can I have a little dog that attacks people and keeps me warm?

FKOD: No.

Quill: Darn it. Can I have a space wiza--

FKOD: No.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Quill

Gender: F

Character type: Urayoungmarotchi

Age: 1 year

Gen: 48

Job: Fisticuffs Student

Status: Is disappointed that she isn't learning how to punch things at school

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Alva

Gender: F

Character type: Uramemetchi

Age: 4 years

Gen: 4

Job: Bank Lady

Status: Isn't a good banker

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Aarron

Gender: M

Character type: Necktietchi

Age: 9 years

Gen: 18

Friendship: 5/6

Status: Will be gone tomorrow

Narena: Well, goodbye everyone! It was nice seeing you again, Epere!~

Epere: And I derived absolutely no pleasure from seeing you again.

Narena: Good, because I'll probably come back at some point!

Epere: *sigh*

Alva: Bye Narena!

Aarron: Have a safe trip!

Quill: Don't take any wooden nickels!

Alva: Look both ways before crossing the street!

Aarron: Don't talk to strangers!

Narena: Okay! Bye! *teleports away*

FKOD: I miss her already.

Epere: Shut up FKOD.

FKOD: :|

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Quill

Gender: F

Character type: Urayoungmarotchi

Age: 2 years

Gen: 48

Job: Fisticuffs Student

Status: Watch out for that giant monster

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Alva

Gender: F

Character type: Uramemetchi

Age: 5 years

Gen: 4

Job: Bank Lady

Status: A dream, you say?

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Reverie

Gender: F

Character type: Hoshitchi

Age: 0 years

Gen: 18

Friendship: 2/6

Status: And the winner is...

FKOD: Am I the only one that's been having weird dreams lately?

Alva: What sort of dreams?

FKOD: Well, last night, I was getting out of school and the buses had pulled up but I didn't know which one to get on. So I got in this red pick-up truck. Wanna know who was driving? Aradia from Homestuck. And in the passenger's seat: Tavros. Also from Homestuck. We were driving and Tavros and I were goofing off, and then when I mentioned to Aradia what a good driver she was, she was all like, "Yeah, this is the first time I've ever drove a car."

Ryyx: I dreamed that Airon was kidnapped by some guy who took him to a beach. And when I got to the beach, this girl insisted that I go to the mall with her, even though I told her that I didn't have time and that I was looking for Airon.

FKOD: Well at least you didn't hop into a car being driven by a thirteen-year-old alien girl.

Ryyx: True.

Quill: I dreamt that a giant monster came to our house and then Freakazoid asked me to fight it by using FKOD's DS to fire lasers at it.

Reverie: Did you win?

Quill: I don't know, I woke up before I could find out.

FKOD: Well, you will get to find out today's fun fact! Did you know: when you are snoring, you are not dreaming.

Dr. Blobagus: What, you think I can't multitask?

FKOD: What?

Dr. Blobagus: I see how it is. You're judging me, aren't you?

FKOD: You don't even snore in your sleep.

Dr. Blobagus: ...Oh.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Quill

Gender: F

Character type: Urazukyutchi

Age: 3 years

Gen: 48

Job: Fisticuffs Student

Status: Encourages the use of violence

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Alva

Gender: F

Character type: Uramemetchi

Age: 6 years

Gen: 4

Job: Bank Lady

Status: Encourages the use of negotiation (also has a son, just so ya know)

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Reverie

Gender: F

Character type: Shelltchi

Age: 1 year

Gen: 18

Friendship: 4/6

Status: Encourages the use of colored pencils

Quill: Man, I am so seriously bored.

Reverie: Me too.

Quill: Maybe we should punch each other repeatedly. First one to go unconscious wins.

Reverie: That's the third time you've suggested that today.

Quill: I'll stop pestering you about it when you say yes.

Reverie: You're too violent. Why don't we do something peaceful... like drawing?

Quill: BORING.

Alva: Here's a compromise: draw people punching each other.

Quill: Okay, I can deal with that.

Reverie: Fine.

FKOD: And now, for a fun fact! Did you know: Picasso's full name contains 23 words?

Alva: That's a lot of name-ishness.

Quill: He was a famous artist right? And Gaia is trying to be an artist... maybe you should invest in some middle names.

FKOD: Hm... I'll have to think on that.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Quill

Gender: F

Character type: Urazukyutchi

Age: 4 years

Gen: 48

Job: Doctor?!

Status: That guy is sassy

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Theo

Gender: M

Character type: Hitodetchi

Age: 0 years

Gen: 4

Job: Preschooler

Status: Gas?!

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Reverie

Gender: F

Character type: Marotchi

Age: 3 years

Gen: 18

Friendship: 6/6

Status: Wants to be a witch

FKOD: Er, sorry for not updating yesterday. I was going to update, but then the internet was all like, "Haha, no." Anyways, yesterday I went out to lunch and then saw the new Harry Potter movie. It was pretty good.

Reverie: I wish I could use magic.

FKOD: Don't we all?

Ryyx: Well, I already can.

FKOD: Shut up, Ryyx, no one asked you.

Ryyx: It sounded like a question addressed to everyone in the nearby vicinity.

FKOD: Well it was a rhetorical question.

Ryyx: Well I'm sorry that I didn't realize that.

FKOD: You should be.

Airon: FKOD, stop being rude. He said he was sorry, didn't he?

FKOD: He said it in a very sassy manner.

Quill: Ryyx says a lot of things in a sassy manner.

Ryyx: No I don't.

Reverie: He doesn't talk to Airon in a sassy manner.

Quill: Well, would you talk to your boyfriend in a sassy manner?

Reverie: No.

Ryyx: Can we stop talking about my alleged sassiness?

FKOD: But you are so sassy that it hurts.

Ryyx: No I'm not.

Airon: Gaia, stop it.

FKOD: No.

Airon: Gaia.

FKOD: Airon.

Airon: Gaia.

FKOD: Airon.

Airon: Gaia.

FKOD: Theo.

Theo: Quill.

Quill: Reverie.

Reverie: Quill.

Quill: Ryyx.

Ryyx: Gaia.

Gaia: Reverie.

Reverie: Airon.

Airon: Ryyx.

Ryyx: Airon.

Airon: Quill.

Quill: Theo.

Theo: Gaia.

FKOD: Why are we doing this again?

Airon: I don't know.

FKOD: Okay. Maybe we should do a fun fact.

Reverie: Good idea.

FKOD: Did you know: the holes in Swiss cheese are caused by the expansion of gas in the cheese curd during the ripening period.

Theo: Gas?!

Quill: Why are you flipping out?

Theo: Because gas is weird and gross.

FKOD: Gas is just any substance made up of little molecules spazzing all over the place instead of clumping together like they do in liquids and solids.

Theo: Oh. Okay.