I've gone from firmly believing in God and Jesus (and maybe believing a few other weird things for a while
) to being completely unsure about it all. It's not that I'm REJECTING God, it's just that sometimes I think it seems so.....unlikely, and there isn't really any evidence at all. Then I get mad at myself when I think those thoughts D: I'm just scared that there isn't really any afterlife. I'd rather be in hell than be nonexistent. That, to me, is the scariest thing. I wonder if religion was just invented by people long ago who were scared, too. If you think about it, Christian beliefs aren't really any more logical or likely than Indians believing in animal spirits and stuff. And we dismiss that as crazy and untrue. I'm scared that there is no afterlife, and that I won't be able to live....anywhere. That is just horrifying. To not be able to think...I know people say "Yeah but you're dead so you wouldn't know" but that's my biggest fear. I'm not really an Atheist or anything yet, but I keep thinking it's more and more likely there isn't anything after this life, and I've been crying about that a lot lately. I've tried reading the Bible and stuff like that, but that just makes me feel even MORE unsure, and I start thinking about how ridiculous the stories sound. I just hope there is...SOMETHING after this life. I don't really care if it's heaven, reincarnation, whatever. Just....something. So, I really WANT to believe, I just don't know if I do anymore. Sorry for the long post