I have a big problem

[Lady_Shay]

My mom won't let me wear pants because of our religon. I mean, it's the 21st century and people changed the rules to fit today's trends and people. I have friends who are just as religous as me and they wear pants. Heck, even their moms wear pants. I need ways to convince her. HELP MEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Vadermort]

Um..

I'm sorry, really, but that's just insane.

Ask her why she won't let you. Like, what's wrong with them? Then, not TOO loudly, you should turn down every reason she gave you why they're bad. Then, so you don't sound too mean, you should give her reasons why you SHOULD wear pants. Not reasons like "Everyone else is!" or " It's the 21st century!" I mean like REAL reasons.

Are they more comfortable? Do they fit better? Do they match up with more shirts? Is it easier to move around in them?

Giver her REAL reasons to consider it. Not just fashion reasons. Comfort, and practical reasons.

Hope I was of some help :3

 

[paper*cut]

..... You only wear shorts? o_o

What about in the winter?

 

[Vadermort]

... I think she meant skirts..

 

[tamaw/pants]

Hm.. well if it's in your religion and your parents are religious and follow strictly to their rules I'm not sure what you can do.

You can explain to them why you should be able to but if they say no then there's nothing else you can do.

May I ask what religion you guys follow? Just for curiosity's sake - if you'd rather keep that private that's fine, too.

 

[Neon Tiger.]

i dunno.

religion tends to suggest ridiculous things. x_x'

 

[Cinderpelt]

I'm not sure what the religion is... but I know a few girls at my school who seem to be in the same position as you!

Ask your mother why it's part of your religion. I argue and question Catholicism all time time... I'm guess this is part of your "man made" religion.

For example, in my religion, only males can enter the priest hood. I've discussed this with my youth director just for curriosity's sake. Why can't women be priests? No where in the Bible does it say that women cannot be priests - it's just the way it is, and it's society.

A lot of the Catholic (and I'm guessing Christian?) sacraments are man made, as in, man on earth came up with them, and God did not.

I'm guessing that 'your' God did not say, "I here by oppose women wearing slacks!" I bet it's just traditionally what women are meant to wear, and your church says that's right.

So ask your mom why you're religion outlaws females wearing anything buy skirts, and you'll get an answer like, "That's just the way our religion is!"

If you see that crack in her armor, use Vadermort's suggestions and give her real reasons that pants should be acceptable.

 

[Neon Tiger.]

what religion is it? o.o

 

[tamaw/pants]

I'm not sure what the religion is... but I know a few girls at my school who seem to be in the same position as you!
Ask your mother why it's part of your religion. I argue and question Catholicism all time time... I'm guess this is part of your "man made" religion.

For example, in my religion, only males can enter the priest hood. I've discussed this with my youth director just for curriosity's sake. Why can't women be priests? No where in the Bible does it say that women cannot be priests - it's just the way it is, and it's society.

A lot of the Catholic (and I'm guessing Christian?) sacraments are man made, as in, man on earth came up with them, and God did not.

I'm guessing that 'your' God did not say, "I here by oppose women wearing slacks!" I bet it's just traditionally what women are meant to wear, and your church says that's right.

So ask your mom why you're religion outlaws females wearing anything buy skirts, and you'll get an answer like, "That's just the way our religion is!"

If you see that crack in her armor, use Vadermort's suggestions and give her real reasons that pants should be acceptable.

True and I think this is sort of like how Muslim women are generally supposed to wear the head cover, hijab.

It's probably for modesty sake. I always wondered why many Muslim women do wear the hijab and it's for modesty reasons. In their culture I'm pretty certain, correct me if I'm wrong, but I know in the time of Jesus a woman's hair was considered more sacred than it is today [for you familiar with Mary washing the feet of Jesus with oil and her hair, that's why it was such a big deal because her hair was considered her most prized and sacred possession] and so this tradition is actually commanded, in some ways, by the Quarn because Allah called the women to be modest.

For these reasons I think it's unfair to judge with our own societal looking glasses. I personally do not wear short shorts and low cut shirts because I believe it to be immodest though others wear these things and find them acceptable. We may have different views but you really can't judge their culture based on your own.

 

[Memetchitamagotchi]

Um..I'm sorry, really, but that's just insane.

Ask her why she won't let you. Like, what's wrong with them? Then, not TOO loudly, you should turn down every reason she gave you why they're bad. Then, so you don't sound too mean, you should give her reasons why you SHOULD wear pants. Not reasons like "Everyone else is!" or " It's the 21st century!" I mean like REAL reasons.

Are they more comfortable? Do they fit better? Do they match up with more shirts? Is it easier to move around in them?

Giver her REAL reasons to consider it. Not just fashion reasons. Comfort, and practical reasons.

Hope I was of some help :3

I totally agree, that's ridiculous.

Is your dad against it too? If he isn't then ask him about it. Or your moms mom and dad, well your grandparents, maybe they can convince your mom.

 

[Neon Tiger.]

sounds really strange

 

[FireCracker]

it sucks to be you then

just ask her and if she says no don't throw a fit

 

[GotchiGirl96]

..... You only wear shorts? o_oWhat about in the winter?

No, of course not. She only wears skirts.

Anyway, if you tell your mom that you like the look of pants better and that they are more comfortable than skirts, maybe she'll be convinced enough to let you wear them.

 

[Lady_Shay]

it sucks to be you thenjust ask her and if she says no don't throw a fit

Um, this topic is about trying to convince my mom to let me where pants, not just to ask her then give in. :/

Also, for all of you who asked, I am Jewish.

And, Cinderpelt, If I do ask her why we can't wear pants. She has a reason (A stupid one that is) She says that "It outlines our private place and sqeezes our butts!!" It's not like anyone would notice that. The problem with her is that she is way too into details. Like whenever I get a hair cut, and she notices that something minor was there, like one part of my hair is longer than the other or he/she forgot to cut one strand of hair. She gets annoyed at it and then throws a fit and says she hates the haircut, even though she said it was great in the first place. Anyone got a soltion for that?

 

[TigerLily013]

Also, for all of you who asked, I am Jewish.

I think you're the only jewish person I've met/heard of/seen post who isn't allowed to wear pants. Sounds more like your mother just sticking to the old values or something. No idea.

Anyway TWP and others made good points. I mean if you already tried to talk your mother into it, and she's not giving in, then there's little you can do until you grow up and live on your own. Best to just obey her for now.

 

[bratztroxg]

True and I think this is sort of like how Muslim women are generally supposed to wear the head cover, hijab.

It's probably for modesty sake. I always wondered why many Muslim women do wear the hijab and it's for modesty reasons. In their culture I'm pretty certain, correct me if I'm wrong, but I know in the time of Jesus a woman's hair was considered more sacred than it is today [for you familiar with Mary washing the feet of Jesus with oil and her hair, that's why it was such a big deal because her hair was considered her most prized and sacred possession] and so this tradition is actually commanded, in some ways, by the Quarn because Allah called the women to be modest.

For these reasons I think it's unfair to judge with our own societal looking glasses. I personally do not wear short shorts and low cut shirts because I believe it to be immodest though others wear these things and find them acceptable. We may have different views but you really can't judge their culture based on your own.

Totally agreed - some great advice here! =]

I have many Jewish friends myself who wear pants all the time. If your mother will insist on doing this, then it is her bad but you can start wearing what you want as soon as you leave home! I'm sure that if you explain all your points to her (practical reasons, not just "Everybody's doing it.") then she will be willing to consider granting you consent. You could even start off with just one pair that you could wear when you needed, or if you were going out with some friends. Just talk over something reasonable for both of you, and I'm sure it will turn out great.

If not, I'm afraid there's nothing you can do, and nobody can help you with that. You'll just have to buy a very cute selection of skirts!! And if they get cold in the Winter, pair them with tights/leggings and warm boots. Denim skirts can look very cute, and are the next best thing from jeans, while cream corduroy skirts are also very cute and can be really flattering. And long tops with leggings are also super cool right now. Even if you can't wear pants/jeans quite yet, there's still a whole ton of ways you can look fab while keeping your Mother happy! Good luck! =3

 

[cluck_cluck_chicken]

Wow. Odd.

If you found some pants that aren't tight

It outlines our private place and sqeezes our butts[unquote] Almost everyone wears pants so tell her no one will look at you and say 'Oh. Shes got private parts and a squeezed butt. Revolte' Because no one will. Seriously odd.

 

[illiey12]

Might be religion, and I dont find it strange at all. Some people aren't allowed to wear anything apart from black and other stuff that people might find ridiculous. But still, going back on-topic, I think you should ask to wear some slightly baggier pants. I dont have much of a solution, sorry. Also, don't skirts squeeze butts aswell?? Strange...

 

[Neon Tiger.]

Just tell her that it's what you want to do. .__.

 

[TamaMum]

Um, this topic is about trying to convince my mom to let me where pants, not just to ask her then give in. :/
Also, for all of you who asked, I am Jewish.

Lady_Shay, your first post told us your mom won't let you wear pants because of your religion.

Unless you can come up with a convincing religious argument that will change her mind, you are going to be stuck with wearing skirts and are just going to have to deal with it.

If it's a religious issue, then I can't judge whether it is right or wrong. I'm not Jewish and I wouldn't dream of criticising your mom's choice of clothing based on her beliefs.

All I can suggest is that you talk with your rabbi - or another older (female) member of your family - Aunt, Grandmother, Older Sister, etc.

Explain to them that your Mom has forbidden you to wear pants because "She says that "It outlines our private place and sqeezes our butts!!" and ask them for advice on how to have a sensible discussion with her that will help her see your own point of view about pants - and how you do not believe that they are immodest.

If you want to win an argument, don't go head to head - that rarely works with any parents - no matter what their beliefs are

You have to find a strategy that is going to change her mind without making her lose face.

That's important and it will be a lot easier for her to give in if she doesn't think you're just being awkward and dramatic about the whole thing.

The minute she thinks you're doing it just to prove that you are right and she is wrong, you've lost.